This past Monday I arrived in Siena, Italy to begin my semester abroad. The past few months have been a bit wild in terms of not really having a permanent place to live, which doesn’t bother me, but it is a strange feeling to consistently be a guest in someone else’s home. For about four months, I lived in Berlin with host parents. I felt as comfortable as I possibly could have living with people who I’d only known for a few months, but no place will ever be like living with my parents. After Berlin, I met up with my parents and sisters in Croatia and we spent about two weeks together—I hadn’t realized how much I missed my family and, while we were living in rented apartments for those two weeks, I reverted back to the sweet feeling of complete comfort. After Croatia I headed to Madrid and stayed with my aunts, uncles, and grandparents for a few days. And after that, I spent a night in Rome with my mom’s cousin. Now I’m in Siena, living with an adorable Italian host mom, and I couldn’t be happier—but it’s still strange to be a guest. When people ask me if I miss home, it’s not my house or Pennsylvania that I miss—it’s my parents and sisters and dog and feeling comfortable doing whatever I feel like, whether it’s grabbing whatever I want from the kitchen or lying lazily on the couch—things you don’t do when you’re a guest—not because my hosts aren’t incredibly welcoming (my host mom constantly tells me “my house is your house” and “this is your home”) but because of the fact that this is a temporary place I’m living in.
In terms of Siena, this city is beautiful. It’s a medieval city and the only thing that reminds me that we’re not living in the 1200’s are the cars. It’s very different from Berlin (obviously) and Philadelphia (OBVIOUSLY) but I really love it here. This week is our orientation and we’ve begun our Italian classes but next week all courses will officially begin. My focus for this semester is getting to the point where Italians don’t know where I’m from when I speak to them so we’ll seeeeeeeeeee how that goes.
Ciao!!!
Cecilia,
It sounds like you have had an incredible journey the past few months and still have a lot ahead of you! Even though my family is only a few hours away from me, I 100% understand the feelings you have about missing them. I have moved around a few times growing up so I understand that your family are the people who make home so special. I hope you keep us updated on your adventures in Italy! I will be excited to read your blog each week to learn more! I hope you enjoy your time there and fully immerse yourself in the experience!
Hi Cecilia! Happy to hear that you’re enjoying yourself and getting the international experience without being an international student. You are lucky and fortunate that at such an early age in life you are able to see a nice cocktail of east and west, converse and hear multiple languages, and challenge yourself to be the guest. It’s hard. Being the host is easier any day because of our innate tendency to take charge.
I resonate with a lot of what you said, simply, because I am at a point in life where I don’t unpack completely. If I could show you, my clothes are weirdly lying around a suitcase and a laundry basket in front of my wardrobe. Sometimes I wonder if there is even a point in setting up my clothes in the wardrobe. I had this realization much before I came to the US. I realized that we had to leave the house we lived in for ten years. We were tenants. Every part of that house is fresh in my memories as if it was my own. But when I realized, at a very young age, that our house wasn’t our house, after all, I dropped my love for places and started seeking shelter within people instead of walls. A lot of what I own includes secrets, memories, lies, heartbreaks, and laughs that had nothing to do with the setting, but the people within the setting.
Thanks for your post, and know that more than anything I miss running into you. Here’s a Jhumpa Lahiri quote that goes with the context. “Pack a pillow and a blanket and see as much of the world as you can. You will not regret it. One day it will be too late.”
It sounds like you are having the time of your life abroad. I remember when I was able to travel oversees while I was a freshman I know that was definitely a highlight of my time here at Penn State.
The only piece of advice that I would give you if you haven’t started this habit yet is to learn how to completely immerse yourself into another culture. Try to go to each different place with an open-mind eager to know what will come next. I feel with that attitude, the trip will be a new journey everyday. I wish you all the best in Europe!
Hi Cecelia! I am so excited for you and please keep us all updated on your adventures. This sounds incredibly exciting. Please eat extra plates of food for me. I pray that you find more comfort with your new host mom. I’m praying for you!
But, this idea of missing comfort is interesting. We get excited for college because we are tired of the comfort of high school and move onto college and become excited about moving on to new things. When will that cycle stop? I am absolutely too comfortable at school in my living situation. I have lived in the same room for over a year, and lived on the same floor, eaten the same food, walked the same sidewalks and used the same bathroom for three years. I’m ready for an apartment and honestly ready to move onto graduate school. When will I live in the moment? I feel like I’ll always look forward.