For better or for worse, til ________ do us part

What has happened to the sanctity of marriage? According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the divorce rate of first marriage is around 50 percent; second marriages are at 60-67 percent and third marriages are at 73-74 percent. I knew that the divorce rates in the United States were pretty high, but I didn’t think they were this high. It makes me sad to think that this is what marriage has come to. Apparently, the concept of “til death do us part” has become “til we decide to end things.”

As a helpless romantic myself, I always thought that marriage expressed the highest level of commitment. But now, the fact that a marriage can be so easily terminated by two signatures on some divorce papers really diminishes what that commitment means. It would seem that society doesn’t hold marriage at the same sanctity as it once did. People get into marriages too quickly or for the wrong reasons or maybe without true understanding of the life-long commitment. This then leads to problems down the road. Then consequences like broken families and negative emotional effects on children could result. That’s not always the case, but it’s certainly a possibility.

Popular culture and media only make matters worse. In the world of Hollywood, celebrity couples get divorced left and right, like it’s no big deal. What happened to wedding vows? Don’t they mean anything? In Bruno Mars’ song “Marry You,” he suggests spontaneously getting married as “something dumb to do.” Then there’s Kim Kardashian who was married for 72 days. Marriage shouldn’t be game or some impulsive that that you can just magically undo. It should be about seriously committing yourself to someone through love and support. If someone isn’t completely ready to take that path, then they should think twice before saying “I do.”

I do understand that sometimes there are extenuating and unforeseen circumstances where divorce could possibly be acceptable. Things happen and people change. But even with things like infidelity or irreconcilable differences, there’s still the chance of making things work. The couple made a commitment so they really should try to maintain it. I think things would be better if the institution of marriage was restored to what it was meant to be, untainted by high divorce rates. All couples should take their wedding vows to heart and remain faithful and loving until death. Sure, sometimes it gets hard, but if the marriage contains the love and commitment that it should, nothing is impossible to overcome. Less divorce, less broken hearts, less broken families, more love.



6 thoughts on “For better or for worse, til ________ do us part

  1. Sarabeth C. Royer

    This is so true. People sometimes just get married on a whim!!! What happened to the commitment, what happened to the idea “till death do us part!” ? It is sad to look at the divorce rates in the US. Great post, and you are really good at writting! I felt your passion and anger and confusion. Awesome post, and I entirely agree. AMEN sistah, AMEN!

  2. Alex

    I agree that we’d probably be better off if people spent more time figuring out whether marriage is the right option for them. We live in a culture where instant gratification is the way we’re conditioned to live. If we took a step back and really examined our lives, we would probably make better life choices. However, I do believe in divorce as a legitimate option for couples. There is nothing noble or moral about “sticking it out until the end.” We have only one life to lead and we should approach the choices we make from that perspective. Sure, the couple can try to work things out, but in many instances, it really is better if they separate.

  3. Haley Guay

    So very true, Erika! This is a really great post. Aren’t the divorce rates insane?! Those are incredibly high numbers! When I think about those rates, I just imagine myself flipping a quarter and saying “Well. That’s how marriage is like.” Love how you talk about the children and how they are impacted by divorce. These tragedies impact the children’s emotions tremendously, leading to even bigger emotional problems in the future. It’s OK, Erika; I’m a helpless romantic myself so I completely agree with you! Hang in there! We will find our Prince Charming! Awesome work, friend!

  4. Brian Pugh

    BTW it is so weird that Kim is preggers, and it’s so ironic because it’s Kanye’s kid (I ain’t sayin she’s a gold digger). Like people should care when 2 super rich people with huge egos have a kid outside of marriage lol.

  5. Michelle Santos

    My parents are divorced and it sucks but honestly i prefer them getting divorced. They tried to work things out and it just couldn’t work and I see them a lot happier separated than when they were struggling together as a married couple and just unsatisfied with how their marriage turned out. So I know divorce sucks but in the stressful enviroment we live today there are other factors that come into play where it is just beyond the married couples control. For example money is a huge factor and some personalities just don’t click and they didn’t realize it until they got married. I wouldn’t want to have to deal with a divorce in the future but honestly I only have one life and I’m not gonna spend the rest of it with someone I don’t think I’m capable of getting a long with even though at one point I thought I did. Also marriage can change people in certain aspects we probably cant understand today. Pretty much divorce sucks and I wish people can get along more but personally I’m glad my parents got divorced I hated it when they wouldn’t get along and now their both happier going their on separate ways.

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