I have a confession to make: retirement was boring.

Sure, going a whole month without having to blog had its perks, but with so many groundbreaking statistical performances this year, I was itching to get back to the keyboard.

And so, here we are (I bet this is how Brett Favre when he made a comeback for the umpteenth time).

In my return week, I’ve decided to jump on the NBA reporting bandwagon. As the NBA season approaches the halfway point, it seems that every single NBA analyst, caught up in the hype and fanfare of the all-star festivities, posts their personal choices for all-star game lineups, and I’m joining in on the action.

Well, sort of. For the past couple years, whenever the all-star break rolls around, I find myself complaining about the ridiculousness of the fan voting system. Lord knows I have my gripes with the selection process – *cough cough,* Zaza Pachulia – and given that this is a blog about advanced statistics, I thought that instead I’d write about the crew of ballers defying statistical odds and delivering stat-stuffed lines on a daily basis.

The following is my criteria for selection:

• My choices are solely based on the 2016-2017 campaign. Absolutely no consideration is given to previous years.
• I am focusing on player performance holistically. If a player had a strong run near the all-star break, but was inconsistent during the bulk of the season, they don’t make the cut.
• I’m examining statistical performances that I find intriguing. They may not necessarily produce wins, but they are historically significant, which is more important in this case.
• These selections are NOT representative of who I think are the best players in the NBA. They are for players who I believe merit recognition for their statistical prowess. That’s it.

Without further ado, here are my picks for the 2017 All-Stat team.

Guards

Isaiah Thomas

Step aside, James Harden. It’s the final two minutes, and Isaiah Thomas is about to go full-on beast mode. You definitely don’t want to stand in his way.

For real though, nobody, and I mean nobody, has thrived more in clutch situations than IT2. When placed in front of the spotlight, Thomas has played with a poise and aplomb akin to a championship veteran. In the fourth quarter, Thomas is averaging a staggering 10.1 points, and is on pace to shatter the NBA’s fourth quarter scoring record. He also ranks first in points on drives (9.7) and points per possession on the pick and roll (1.09), meaning that once he’s in the lane, it’s practically impossible to stop him.

Thomas has so much grit and swagger, it’s no wonder that AI has been heaping praise on the 5’9” point guard.

Russell Westbrook

I told y’all. I straight up told y’all.

Russell Westbrook is a triple double machine. He’s sporting averages of 30 points, 10 rebounds, and 10 assists a game. His PER is tops in the league at 29.29. His EWA, estimated wins average, is 14.7, second only to James Harden. There’s no one in the league that can stop him.

Honestly, I don’t really have anything else to say. His case to be on this list is so obvious, it’s not even worth arguing.

Forwards

Giannis Antetokounmpo

This dude can flat out ball.

Standing at 6’11” with a 7-3 wingspan, Giannis has blossomed this season, posterizing big men and dazzling defenders with his basketball vision and freakish athleticism. He’s top seven in the league in PER (27.7), EWA (13.2), and win shares (7.3) this season, which doesn’t even accurately reflect how valuable he is to the Bucks’ franchise.

Currently, the point forward is leading his team in EVERY base stat category (points, rebounds, assists, steals, and blocks). If he’s able to sustain his top-level play for the rest of the season, he’ll be the first player in LEAGUE HISTORY to do so. Let that sink in.

Unfortunately, the Bucks are a paltry 21-24 at the moment, though Milwaukee fans have little to worry about knowing that their burgeoning superstar is locked up under contract for the next four years.

Will we be seeing Giannis hoisting an MVP trophy in the near future?

Anthony Davis

If we weren’t so accustomed to Anthony Davis’ versatility, we’d probably be talking more about how dominant he’s been this season.

Davis has been a virtually unstoppable presence, combining defensive rim protection, scoring efficiency, and high basketball IQ. He’s the only player in the NBA to be in the top ten in rebounding, and top five in scoring and blocks. Additionally, his value added – a metric which measures the projected number of added points to a team, when compared to a replacement level player – is 370.3, highest among all power forwards.

What Davis does for his team, both on the stat sheet and the records column, speaks volumes to his talent. I don’t think that there’s a more complete power forward in the league right now.

Center

Joel Embiid

Trust. The. Process.

In a city with less hope than the Cleveland Browns (ok, that’s a slight exaggeration, but you get the picture), Embiid has been a savior that has lifted Philly’s basketball spirit and ignited a playoff push. Plus, he’s easily got the best twitter account in the NBA.

Embiid’s per game numbers are flabbergasting: 20 points, 8 rebounds, 2.5 blocks, all while playing a mere 25 minutes a night. He’s also led Philadelphia to a 9-3 start in 2017, providing tremendous value to a team that just had 10 wins a year ago. In fact, according to ESPN, when he’s on the floor, the Sixers have a scoring margin of a 55 win team, compared to just a 12 win team when he sits out. “That’s a difference of 43 wins, based solely on team performance hinged on his presence.”

If Embiid’s game continues to develop at this rate, with his unlimited ceiling, there’s no telling to what heights his game will go. #NBAVote