College Romance

Going into college I was single and ready to mingle. I was thrown into a brand new environment with fresh, different faces and exhilarating new opportunities. But most importantly, I had absolutely no ties back home. Except for my dog and I guess my family too. Anyways, I would constantly ask myself: “Why would anyone want to go into college still in a relationship from high school?” It was this thought that prompted me to write this blog post. I thought to myself what are the stats behind the success of high school relationships throughout college?

unknown

Does long distance work?

We have all heard the saying “distance makes the heart grow fonder”, but does it really? Statistically speaking there are 32.5% reported cases of long distance relationships in college. This statistic makes it seem as though long distance relationships are very common; however, we must also consider the success rate of these relationships. On average, 40% of long distance relationships do not last. For these 40%, if it’s not meant to be it takes about 4.5 months for the relationship to end. This means almost half of long distance relationships end, so unfortunately the odds are not in your favor.

 

How does a relationship effect your college performance?

While researching this topic, I became interested in how being in a relationship effects a student’s academic performance. According to a study more students are probable to skip class if they are in a romantic relationship. This is supposedly due to the fact that they would skip class in place of being able to see their significant other. This could or could not be an example of correlation and causation. This is could be causation because though you could be skipping class to see your significant other; however, your absences could be due to a lack of time devoted to homework. If you are in a relationship you could be spending time going on dates which leads to you skipping class to make up the time and work on your missed assignments. In this situation, the missed assignments would be the third variable.

 

Should you stay with your significant other going into college?

Going into college can be scary. You most likely will know absolutely no one, be in an unfamiliar place, and very far away from the comfort of your home. It’s easy to cling onto things and people that are accustomed to you. However, should this justify you staying with your significant other entering college? I was able to find a quiz on the trust worthy site of Cosmopolitan; however, I believe you should trust your intuition. My mom has always told me to “trust your gut” no matter how big or small the situation is. John Coates conducted a research study at Cambridge University, testing this common saying which resulted in positive feedback. It turns out that trusting our gut has been proven to be highly effective in successful outcomes.

So in terms of staying in your high school relationship, the choice is completely up to you. Look at the stats, consider the effects, and most importantly, trust your gut!

 

Sources:

http://www.statisticbrain.com/long-distance-relationship-statistics/

https://www.researchgate.net/publication/284205790_Love_and_Other_Grades_A_Study_of_the_Effects_of_Romantic_Relationship_Status_on_the_Academic_Performance_of_University_Students

http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/news/a55333/should-you-break-up-with-him-quiz/

https://www.cam.ac.uk/research/news/gut-feelings-help-make-more-successful-financial-traders

 

 

5 thoughts on “College Romance

  1. Meaghan Elizabeth Simone

    From the POV from a person that has dealt with long distance, unless you and your significant other are 100% sure you want a relationship to work, it won’t. It’s hard not to be able to see and physically encounter someone you care about. Long Distance especially doesn’t work now since hookup culture is the new dating culture. What are your opinions on dating and hookup culture in college?

  2. Wendy Sun

    I feel like even being in a long distance relationship would affect your academic performance. It is just one more thing to stress about. I feel like it affects me more personally because I would stay up as late as 3-4am talking to them. I knew many couples in high school that went to different colleges and they ended up drifting apart. Sometimes I wonder if long distance relationships is worth the time and effort. I thought these statistics was pretty interesting. http://www.longdistancerelationshipstatistics.com/

  3. Julia Rose Gallelli

    Samantha,

    I can relate to your post. I am a junior now, and coming into college as a freshman with a boyfriend from high school at first was very easy. He’d come up to visit me. I’d go home to visit him. We’d take weekend road trips together. He met all of my new friends and would come out with us. The start of freshman year was great.

    Then came the end of first semester and the fights already started. I am not a fighter and neither was he, so that’s how you know there was a problem surfacing. Being in two different places and successfully maintaining a long distance relationship was NO cake walk. I was warned to not enter college with a boyfriend.

    “He’s only a distraction!”

    “You won’t go out!”

    “All you’ll do is fight!”

    “You’re too young.”

    “You don’t know what you want yet!”

    “You’re shutting yourself off to new people and new experiences.”

    …I ignored all of these warnings thinking that I was with the person I was going to marry. I was 18. I was naive- VERY naive. What did my friends and parents expect?

    Brandon and I didn’t fight all the time. We were mostly happy. It’s just the time you spend apart eventually does make you grow apart. Being in a faithful relationship, you shut people out of your life, whether you realize it or not.

    When it came to grades, I was always good with maintaining my grades, but always worrying about what each other was doing was becoming more stressful than I thought.

    Long story short, I am happy I made my own decision, stuck with it, and learned from my choice. I don’t regret it. But, I eventually had to move on. I am young and I need to find myself. I recommend that to anyone coming into college. I did miss out on things that I shouldn’t have. You do NOT know what you WANT yet. Believe me. Our brains don’t even fully develop until we are twenty five. Now I am not saying that I recommend waiting until you are twenty five to date, but give yourself a minute to find out what you want. Stop rushing…You’re going to learn the hard way.

    This is what I do wish I had realized two years ago.

    For your interest, here is an article that talks about the struggles of a long distance relationship in college and why you shouldn’t try it at such a young age:

    http://www.askmen.com/dating/dating_advice/why-breaking-up-is-better-than-a-long-distance-relationship.html

    Overall, I thought your post was very interesting, well written, organized, supported, and attention grabbing. Great job!

  4. Adelaide Christine Edgett

    I have a great deal of experience with what you’re talking about as a survivor of two long distance relationships. If people can make it work, good on them, but that’s a lot of trust to place on one person. RelationshipsRelationships can be fun but in my experience, they’re more suited for times that you’re not bending over backwards for school and work.

  5. rlw5445

    As someone who has been surrounded by friends in relationships all throughout high school and so far in my almost year and a half I have seen both the positive and negative sides of continuing relationships into college. Some of them have been dating since middle school and are still thriving and happy to this day, while some crashed in flames the first week of college. For those that are lucky enough to have a significant other and are worrying about staying in college the Huffington Post has a great article about what factors you need to consider when debating whether or not to stay together at this link http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/16/break-up-before-college-o_n_2079489.html.

Leave a Reply