*This post is supposed to be satire
Nope. I’m not doing it. This week, it’s not gonna happen.
I totally forgot. You know, with all the stuff I had to do, it kinda got lost in the shuffle I guess. That’s totally possible. It’s not like I have a to-do list or anything…. Ok fine I do. Maybe I just.. accidentally filled in the checkbox. Yes, that’s what happened. I’m certain. Just don’t go looking for my to-do list.
I just didn’t have the time. You know, with exams? And homework? And clubs? I’m in 9 clubs, you know. I just have so much work. 20 credits and 9 clubs should be enough to justify just not doing work, right? Right? It’s not as crazy as it sounds, though. I do have *some* free time. Wait, no I gave it away! Fine, I did have some time. Hrmph.
Ok. Fine, it’s not like I didn’t have time to write this blog, I just, kinda, didn’t. It’s not like I couldn’t. I just had better things to do. Like… err… sit and be unproductive until 1am every night? That’s it. All the nothing I was doing took up all my time. Sometimes the 9-hour long Civilization VI VODS just call, ya know? What am I supposed to do about it? Stop watching? And sit, in my dorm, and type out a blog? Clearly you’re uncultured in the ways of districts and adjacency bonuses. Hrmph.
I guess this blog will just always be a future me problem.
And Now For Something Completely Different: Word of the Week
This week’s word of the week is “absquatulate”. According to Merriam-Webster, absquatulate means “abscond” or “decamp”. Which, of course, is completely useless, since those are not common words or even close. So, in the interest of not sending you on a wild goose chase, absquatulate means to either steal or abruptly leave.
I think a more interesting question, though, is how this word was even created, since Merriam-Webster literally lists this word as slang. Excuse me? How is that slang?
Apparently, according to etymonline, it is theorized to be a parodied Latin negation of the word “squat”. It also was originally spelled absquotilate, in true British fashion (the word was originally used in a play by a caricature of an American character. Interestingly though, this word is essentially the equivalent of the word “skedaddle” in current slang. So there you go. There’s your linguistics lesson for the week.
Thanks so much for reading, and until next week, have a good one!
-Will Corvino