This week’s blog, I will be discussing how two difference race group can become friends. According to Psychology Department Lab, race is defined as a concept which signifies and symbolizes social conflicts and interests by referring to different types of human bodies. But also, it says a socially constructed system of classifying individuals according to phenotypical characteristics that are genetically determined but not always consistent. Meanwhile, Psychology Today describes friends as people tend to befriend those who are similar in background, in personality, and sometimes even appearance, an assortative process that resembles the way in which people select prospective mates. However, these definitions are too vague to acknowledge how two different people from different race can become a good friend and even a best friend. Is it possible?
Personally, I believe it is possible. I have two friends who are best friends, but both are not orientated as I am. I am from South Korea, approximately 7000 miles ways from United States. My family came to United States when I was twelve. I had hard time making friends when I was in 6th grade because I couldn’t speak English at all. I was frustrated and bored, but many classmates helped me to learn English and adapt to American culture. I think I am very friendly person because when I make friends I do not judge based on color, socioeconomic status, gender, religion, and sexuality.
One of the best friends is a girl and she is from Russia. I met her in State College, and we did many things lots of guy friends do except sports. But she is more athletic than me not because I stink at sports, but we never liked sports. Our friendship is quite interesting because we are best friends who never had a opposite attraction to one another and personality is opposite as well. I am passive but love practical jokes whereas she is loud but active. Because we are different race and gender, sometimes we get into fights unlike guys friends we just don’t talk for few days until one give up call one and start hanging out again. Although our culture is different, we can still understand and help each other out especially when I am in trouble.
Now I want to know how two different races can become a friend psychologically. According to Dr. Mendoza-Denton, cross-race friendships are not very common in the United States. He adds that, many among us won’t be thinking about people belonging to groups different from our own. This sounds like the intergroup contact we learned this week. It says prejudice and racism makes harder for intergroup to become friends. According Gordon Allport, he believes in order to reduce prejudice through intergroup contact and he lists four conditions. First, the group must have equal status. Her family and my family had equal financial status. Second, the groups must have common goals. We wanted to graduate and get a job as soon as possible. Third, there must be intergroup cooperation. She was very easy-going and friendly person. Lastly, the contact must be supported and recognized by law or custom. I am not sure how law and customs had to do with it since we came from different countries, but we have physical contacts. There is an interesting side having a cross-race friendship, Elizabeth Page-Gould found out that cross-race friendship reduce stress. According to this study, cross-race relationship is great for me and I will continue my friendship with her since it will reduce my stress. I hope everyone find a cross-race friend just like me or do you have any cross-race friends?
Friends. (n.d.). Retrieved February 17, 2019, from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/friends
Mendoza-Denton, R. (2010, November 23). This Holiday, a Toast to Cross-Race Friendship. Retrieved February 17, 2019, from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/are-we-born-racist/201011/holiday-toast-cross-race-friendship
Psychology Department Lab. (n.d.). Retrieved February 17, 2019, from http://labs.psychology.illinois.edu/~lyubansk/Conflict/Identity.htm