I do not have a lot of outstanding core values like many others, but one value that I have cherished for long and that not many people around me in my home country Hong Kong actually cherish as much as I do, in my opinion, is grace – being grateful and thankful for what you have, even they are just very trivial. It is not from what I really “experienced” to realize this important value in me, but from what I have been observing my friends, reading news, reading people’s online posts about their lives, and probably from the general societal situation in Hong Kong.
I am really thankful for having great parents who never really scold me when I fail in achieving something, like getting bad academic results, but instead encourage me to do better next time and teach me it is fine as long as I really tried my best; parents who rarely force me into doing something I do not like, but will teach me to think of and bear the consequences myself for not doing it, and parents who will always stay by my side. Maybe because of their education on me, I am very self-discipline. I never act delinquent. I treasure everything I bought and I have because I believe that “these things are here because I try or work hard to get them”, even it is, material-wise, just a meal or even just a penny. It does not mean I am satisfied with everything and not going forward. I just treasure everything, even the failures, and then move on to acquire even more or improve. It seems very simple, but I did not realized having this kind of thought is not very common among people around me.
Back in my high school in Hong Kong, I was surrounded by a bunch of smart classmates. They always got good exam results, but they were never satisfied. Only a few points lower than the last time they had or than the other classmates and not getting the first place could make them fretful or sad enough (some even cried) for a few days. I know academic results can be important, but I do not see failing just one or a few times a thing that you should be so fixated on because failures are not bad things at all. They help us know what is going wrong and so we can improve.
I started reading a lot of Hong Kong news and posts on Instagram after coming to America. It seems that recently many students are committing suicides. Main reasons for this phenomenon are the students have just too much academic pressure, they think they will not have a “good future” here anyway so why not just end their lives, and they believe living in Hong Kong is like being a slave so they want to avoid it. I would not deny there is something wrong with the society in pushing the students too hard into developing this mainstream idea of how living in Hong Kong is like, thus makes them despair. If just they can share, even a tiny bit, similar thought as me – being thankful for everything you already have instead of clinging on something that “you think” is bad or you will not be able to get – I believe they will feel a lot better. Unfortunately, the negativity in their thoughts is greater than I thought, but this also makes me realize how grace actually has helped me escape from the negative emotions many others are sharing. Still, I really hope I can help them ease their pressure and anxiety.
Being grateful and thankful for what you have, even they are just very trivial, will surely make you happier than you are now. I know it can be very difficult, but if everyone tries to have even a bit of this thought, I believe the world will be filled with a lot less unhappiness.