When you mess up, you mess up. You just have to accept that and move forward. I believe that taking responsibility for yourself and your actions is the most important thing you can do. It’s the most important lesson you can learn as a young adult. This is a lesson that I have been learning since my senior year of high school. I have messed up a lot in my past 20 years on this planet. Finally taking responsibility feels good.
When I was younger I was a “problem child” according to my mother, and my grandparents and all of my teachers. I would get in trouble for talking to much in class, being t0o loud, or not following directions. I have learned how to control two of those things but I’m not going to disclose which ones. When my mom or teacher would confront me with my problems I would deny the issues and pretend that it wasn’t me. I believed that I was not a problem. I was just being me. I was just trying to be an authentic and original person. It wasn’t until a little under three years ago that I finally learned to take responsibility.
In October of 2014 it was time to start planning my classes Senior Prom. My only job was to research and contact some nice banquet halls about hosting our event. I was to ask about dates available in May and June of 2016, how much hosting our event would cost, and how long we could have our prom for. I was supposed to bring my research to the November class meeting. I, being the high school procrastinator that I was, put the research off. The day before the November meeting I remembered that I had work to do. I didn’t have enough time in the day to call the banquet halls and talk about prices and dates, so I went into my meeting unprepared.
When I arrived at the meeting I was nervous. We went through the usual attendance, and the review of last weeks meetings. Then we turned to the Prom section of the meeting. Our advisor asked about findings. I meekly told her that I had no research to present. She and the other attendees of the class meeting were severely disappointed. They had given me this responsibility and I had failed them. Our whole Prom planning timeline was ruined because of me.
That was when I learned to take responsibility for myself and my actions. I could no longer procrastinate or “forget” to do things. I messed up and I accepted that. Now when I mess up I think back to that moment and remember to do the right thing.