First Draft:
Did you know that 46% of Americans will meet the criteria for a diagnosable mental health condition sometime in their life, and half those people will develop these conditions by the age of 14? Most of you were probably unaware of this eye-opening statistic just like so many of the individuals plagued by any of these mental illnesses are unaware they have it at all. That means that more likely than not, statistically speaking almost half of our university is struggling mentally, whether they realize it or not.
Yet, there is still an enormous amount of negative stigma attached to mental health issues, so the green ribbon campaign was created to address this. They created this green ribbon to encourage people to discuss mental health more openly, creating safe spaces for people to share their struggles. Although, the National Mental Health Association declared May as Mental Health Month in 1949, there was no visual reminder associated with this month until 2007 when the Green Ribbon was introduced. This symbol has great significance from its design to its outreach and purpose.
The main aspect that makes this artifact stand out in my opinion is the compelling and intentional visual rhetoric within the symbol itself. To emphasize the purpose of eliminating stigma surrounding mental health this ribbon was assigned the color green. This was done because back in the 1800s, the color green was used in hospitals and other medical institutions to label someone as “insane” when they had a mental issue to any degree. This symbol was created to flip this bias and make the audience realize that green can symbolize feeling safe with your thoughts, and not ashamed by your feelings in contrast to how those individuals labeled with the color green felt judged. This component of visual rhetoric is incredibly impactful to the reader in specifying what individuals should think of when they see green, and to switch the common intuition that whoever is wearing a ribbon this color is not insane, but rather healing.
Another effective aspect of visual rhetoric within this artifact was the choice to design this artifact in shape as a simple ribbon. As Americans, one of the main symbols we recognize when it comes to health are the various ribbons assigned to represent various physical health conditions, whether they are chronic or short-term diseases. These ribbons also invoke a lot of emotion due to the common knowledge that whenever a group is assigned a ribbon they are struggling in some way. So through the creation of this artifact in the shape of a ribbon, anyone who sees it will have the automatic association not only that the issue the individual supports is of importance but that it is necessary to bring awareness to. The strong emotion evoked by this ribbon is an example of this artifact reaching the audience through pathos as well, since this is a relevant issue currently in our population. This I believe was impactful in emphasizing the true possible severity of these mental health conditions, and in further eliminating the stigma of mental health since these ribbons can be easily placed in any area, since its shape is so distinctive, and size is so small both of which invoke a major amount of common emotion.
How can these tiny ribbons really be enforced as important enough to the public though that they will participate in wearing it? The purpose behind the ribbon, and the way members of the campaign enforce the importance of wearing it to raise awareness is the main way the artifact is impactful. Many of the main advocates for this artifact are expanding their outreach through handing these ribbons out with small notes attached in many companies, and schools across the country throughout the year especially through mental health month. The encouragement and easy accessibility of these ribbons in the everyday places they associate with heightens the likelihood of individuals paying attention to the symbol and going on to read the message. The growing accessibility also helps to further instill within our population that mental health is not something an individual should feel the need to hide from others, but rather embrace it in order to get help and inevitably eliminate that stigma around mental health altogether.
The only criticism I do have in regard to this artifact’s outreach is that they do not focus much of it toward the younger, elementary level population. If the accessibility to the ribbon, and the enforcement was taught in school from a young age when children’s brains have the highest flexibility to absorb information, I think this would vastly reduce the risk of them developing undiagnosed mental illnesses in the future.
But with every artifact there are inevitable areas necessary for improvement. Yet, after examining this artifact in relation to other mental health symbols it is clear based on the pathos, commonplace, and visual rhetoric involved in this artifact’s outreach that makes it so impactful. So what would happen if everyone wore these ribbons? Would the stigma still be gone? Or would there still be work to be done?
MAIN CHANGES
The main aspect of my speech I knew I had to change was its length. In my second draft I purposely read through it out loud to know which areas I should shorten, and how to make my overall speech make more sense to the audience.
Final Draft:
Did you know that 46% of Americans will meet the criteria for a diagnosable mental health condition sometime in their life, and of that half will develop these conditions by the age of 14? That means that statistically, almost half of our university’s students are struggling mentally, whether they realize it or not. Most of you were probably unaware of this eye-opening statistic just like so many of the individuals plagued by any of these mental illnesses are unaware they have one at all.
Yet, there is still an enormous amount of negative stigma attached to mental health issues, so the green ribbon campaign was created to address this. They created this green ribbon to encourage people to discuss mental health more openly, creating safe spaces for people to share their struggles. Although the National Mental Health Association declared May as Mental Health Month in 1949, there was no visual reminder associated with this month until 2007 when the Green Ribbon was introduced. This symbol has great significance from its design to its outreach and purpose.
The main aspect that makes this artifact stand out in my opinion is the compelling, intentional visual rhetoric within the symbol itself. To emphasize the purpose of eliminating stigma surrounding mental health, this ribbon was assigned the color green. This was done because in the 1800s, the color green was used on charts in hospitals and other medical institutions to label someone “insane” when they had a mental issue of any kind. This green ribbon symbol was created in an effort to flip this bias and make the audience realize that green can symbolize feeling safe with your thoughts, and not ashamed by your feelings, as those individuals a century ago felt judged. This component of visual rhetoric is incredibly impactful to the reader in specifying what individuals should think of when they see green. It switches the common intuition related to health symbolism that green represents someone diagnosed “insane” but rather the half of our population that’s healing from any struggle.
Another effective aspect of visual rhetoric within this artifact is the shape being a simple ribbon. As Americans, we recognize that ribbons symbolize awareness of health issues, as various ribbons are assigned to represent physical health conditions, whether they are chronic or short-term diseases. These ribbons also invoke a lot of emotion due to the common knowledge that whenever a group is assigned a ribbon they are struggling in some way. So, through creating this artifact in the shape of a ribbon, anyone who sees it will automatically know that the issue is important and requires awareness. The strong emotion evoked by this ribbon and the commonplace of knowledge in association is an example of this artifact reaching the audience through pathos as well, since it’s currently affecting so many in our population. This was impactful in emphasizing the potential severity of these mental health conditions. The ribbon further eliminates the stigma of mental health since the shape is so distinctive, and the size is small, both of which invoke a major amount of common emotion.
But how can these tiny ribbons really communicate the incredible importance of the mental health awareness message to the public? The purpose behind the ribbon, and the way members of the campaign enforce the importance of wearing it to raise awareness, is the main way the artifact is impactful. Advocates for this artifact are expanding their outreach by handing these ribbons out with small notes attached. They are handed out in many companies, and schools across the country throughout the year and especially through the mental health month of May. The encouragement and easy accessibility of these ribbons in everyday places heightens the likelihood of individuals to pay attention to the symbol and to go on to read the message. The growing accessibility in itself also helps to further instill within our population that mental health is not something an individual should feel the need to hide from others, but rather embrace it in order to get help and inevitably eliminate that stigma around mental health altogether.
The only criticism I do have in regard to this artifact’s outreach is that they do not focus much of it toward the younger, elementary level population. Remember that startling statistic: half of those with mental health issues will develop these conditions by the age of 14. If the accessibility to the ribbon, and the enforcement was taught in school from a young age when children’s brains have the highest flexibility to absorb information and when these issues first surface, I think this would vastly reduce the risk of children developing undiagnosed mental illnesses in the future.
With every artifact there are inevitable areas necessary for improvement. Yet, after examining this artifact in relation to other mental health symbols it is clear that the pathos, commonplace, and visual rhetoric involved in this artifact’s outreach are what makes it so impactful. So what would happen if everyone wore these ribbons? Would the stigma still be gone? Or will there always be more work to be done? I hope we have the opportunity to find that out in the future.
Below are images of the first round of changes I made when analyzing changes to make to my first draft for my final one: