Author Archives: Dong Hee Kim

Nature and Nurture Cannot be Separated

Are we born to be good at something or do we learn to be good at the things we weren’t in the first place? The topic of nature versus nurture is one of the most debatable topics throughout the centuries. My belief is that based on nature, we tend to accept new things and if we don’t develop either the nature or the nurture we have, then that is when our ability of doing something degenerate. When my brother was born, he was heard from others that he had a talented skill in crafting and making objects with his hands. He was awarded from numerous places and his elementary school head principle even came to see his work that he had done. Since then, my brother was taught to focus on other areas more such as studying, or do the “practical” thing that we should do to be a more successful person in our life. Since then, I’ve never seen my brother ever make something with his hands or draw a fantastic picture putting all his effort. Ten years later, my brother tells me he doesn’t want to create or design anything now, but simply just do the things he is told to do. I have never doubted once in my life that my brother has talent in the creative field, but what nurtured him throughout the years made him completely different. I do believe that his skills are better than mine, or any other people who weren’t born with the talent, but if you don’t uphold your talent, then I think it slowly fades away.

Another example is that I’ve seen someone who had absolutely no talent at all, at least that’s what her mother and her family members have been talking about her since a long time. She had no talent in sports, studying, socializing, or even enjoying things. So her parents kept telling her that she should change her personalities and be more outgoing if she wanted to succeed in her life. When I first met her, she could barely speak English at all. The only thing she kept doing was persistently study and prepare for her tests, or even socializing issues, she would try to speak up and stand up to others. After a few years I could find that her English dramatically improved and her personality had changed completely different from what she had been before. I believe all this comes from training, what you constantly teach you to think, and how hard you try. So this might sound as a nurture passage but I do not think nurture covers 100 percent of your personality; because her nature of being passive against everything, she tried had to recover that. And her parents were very consistent too so that’s where she probably could have improved by consistently doing what she was told to do.

Nature and nurture does not have an exact rigid answer. Many people differ by DNA structures and the way they were taught from families. However, we can learn that nurture can be created from your nature that was already in you and thus later making the nurture to be a stronger nature than what you originally had. As of a conclusion, do not debate whether nature or nurture is what forms you, because everything that you’re made of is part of your experience, nature, and the nurture you keep developing on.