Ciao everyone! Here is this post’s joke:

Did you hear about the new dating site for retired chemists?

It’s called Carbon Dating!

This joke is excellent and I rate it 9.5/10 because I like science jokes. If I’m a single scientist 50 years from now, you’ll definitely find me on this site.

While roasting college romance culture would be entertaining, this week, we’ll be focusing on another type of dating: carbon dating.

According to Britannica, known also as radiocarbon dating, carbon-14 dating is used to determine the age of inorganic and organic materials. This process plays a role across several academic disciplines, from identifying ancient artifacts and understanding the lives of hominids to classifying rocks found in the Earth’s several layers.

Taking a look at the history, “The carbon-14 method was developed by the American physicist Willard F. Libby about 1946. It has proved to be a versatile technique of dating fossils and archaeological specimens from 500 to 50,000 years old. The method is widely used by Pleistocene geologists, anthropologists, archaeologists, and investigators in related fields” (Britannica).

Carbon-14 is an isotope of carbon-12, which is the most abundant type of carbon. With 2 additional neutrons, carbon-14’s radioactivity plays a crucial role in carbon dating and through beta decay (by gaining an electron), will form stable nitrogen-14. 

However, with neutron interactions with nitrogen atoms in the environment, carbon-14 can be recreated in Earth’s atmosphere. This is due to increased exposure to cosmic rays, known as high-energy radiation, which increases rates of particle collisions to stimulate chemical reactions. 

Carbon-14, or radiocarbon, also comes from carbon dioxide molecules in the atmosphere. After being absorbed by the carbon cycle and plants, this isotope is recirculated among organic matter and reused.

That’s great, but how does carbon dating work?

By exposing matter to carbon-14, it will absorb it, and once the specimen is no longer exposed, it will gradually decrease in concentration of the isotope. Radioactive elements have half lives, meaning that over a certain interval of time, they will half their concentration. From here, the amount of the isotope will decay at a constant and measurable rate. Carbon-14 has a half life of 5,730 ± 40 years, which is insanely long.

Through spontaneous disintegration, which is basically radioactive decay, carbon-14 will half its concentration after 5,730 years. Because carbon-14 decays at this constant rate, an estimate of the date at which an organism died can be made by measuring the amount of its residual radiocarbon (Britannica).

Carbon-14 is special because of its half life, which is so incredibly long that it gives researchers time to determine how much carbon-14 is present versus the amount of carbon-12 present. This is a great achievement in historical fields, but how else can we use other radioactive isotopes?

Well, they play an important role in modern medicine, in which half lives can be utilized to track the concentration of certain drugs or treatments in the human body. Very short half lives are desired, which is why Yttrium-90, Iodine-131, Samarium-153, and Phosphorus-32 are used, because who wants chemicals in their body? Not I.

Now, it’s my turn to make like a tree and get out of here. Until next time my jokers!

Reference: “Carbon-14 Dating.” Edited by The Editors of Encyclopædia Britannica,

                 Encyclopædia  Britannica, Encyclopædia Britannica, Inc.,

                 https://www.britannica.com/science/carbon-14-dating.

Ciao everyone! Welcome back. Here is this week’s joke:

How much did it cost for a pirate to get his ears pierced?

A buccaneer! 

I would rate this joke a 9.25/10 because I think it’s clever. I know it made me laugh and I hope you guys enjoyed it too.

This wouldn’t be a blog by me if I didn’t include a pure history post for you all. We tend to see pirates all over the place, from blockbuster movie franchises to Halloween costumes to history textbooks; so what are some of the basics we know about these swashbucklers? Arrrrrrre you ready kids? The only acceptable response would be “aye aye, captain!”

The classical definition of a pirate is someone who commits piracy, which would include robbing and plundering ships. I think I’d also characterize them as extremely stylish with excellent hats, high boots, and nice golden jewelry.

As early as the Vikings, Phoenicians, and the Roman Empire, sailors have been marauding ships for ages. I’d like to focus on the prime of piracy, which was between the sixteenth and eighteenth century, most notably called the Golden Age of Piracy.

Like most things, piracy across the western hemisphere can be attributed to the Age of Exploration and colonialism in North, South, and Latin America.

After Christopher Columbus’ travels to the West Indies, several Spanish ships frequented this voyage over the Atlantic and the Caribbean, transporting goods back and forth among the colonies and Europe. Silver, gold, and other precious stones and gems were carried back to the Spanish monarchs, or rather, were attempted to be brought back. The Royal Museums of Greenwich state that these large ships, called galleons, were massive targets for pirates.

Low and behold, when the lovely Jolly Roger or Black Pearl was spotted from the crow’s nest, thievery was about to commence. Pirates were pretty violent and even raided coastal towns with accessible docks when floating ships weren’t enough.

The buccaneers were the pirates that robbed galleons, since they lived on Hispaniola in the Caribbean and its tiny turtle-shaped neighbor, Tortuga, in the 17th century.  Maybe you’ve heard of this from the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise, which is more accurate than you may think.

Most surprising is that “the governors of Caribbean islands paid the buccaneers to attack Spanish treasure ships. Although raids began in this way, with official backing, the buccaneers gradually became out of control, attacking any ship they thought carried valuable cargo, whether it belonged to an enemy country or not. The buccaneers had become true pirates” (Royal Museums of Greenwich).

Captain Jack Sparrow’s story and his encounters appear to be historically correct, since several scenes picture the local royalty paying thieves under their finely ornamented tables. While one of Johnny Depp’s iconic roles is simply fictitious, it was based off of real-life pirate John Ward, an Englishmen turned Muslim after settling down.

Other famous eye-patch-baring and gold-tooth-sporting pirates worth mentioning are Henry Morgan, William ‘Captain’ Kidd, ‘Calico’ Jack Rackham, Bartholomew Roberts and Blackbeard. While modern pirates may still survey unvigilant seas, I still think they’re pretty cool.

Now, it’s my turn to make like a tree and get out of here, or perhaps in this case, walk the plank. Until next time my jokers!

Reference: Royal Museums Greenwich. “The Golden Age of Piracy.” Royal Museums Greenwich,

               Royal Museums Greenwich, https://www.rmg.co.uk/stories/topics/golden-age-piracy. 

Ciao everyone! Welcome back, and enjoy this week’s joke:

What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta!

I would rate this joke a 9.75/10 because it just sounds funny. Simple.

I come from a robust Italian household that thrives off the aroma of garlic, freshly cooked pasta, and loud yelling ringing throughout the house. Of course, not to forget the sauce vs. gravy debate that seems to be splitting the family…

Therefore, I feel like it’s only logical to take a look at one of the best foods: pasta. This is my typical Sunday afternoon, and no offense, but the dining hall food can’t even compare to it. Sucks.

In this post, I will highlight some types of pasta and rate them based on taste, texture, and tummy feel, and of course provide unnecessary comments.

-Spaghetti:

Taste: 10/10

Texture: 8/10

Tummy feel: 9/10

Spaghetti may be the obvious, and perhaps most sought out type, but there are so many better options. It tastes good but it’s overused and quite stereotypical.

-Farfalle:

Taste: 10/10

Texture: 9.5/10

Tummy feel: 9/10

Farfalle, also known as the “bow tie” pasta, is great for holding sauce in its crevices. My only critique is that it’s hard to stab with a fork.

-Ravioli:

Taste: 1/10

Texture: 2/10

Tummy feel: 1/10

I absolutely don’t like ravioli. I don’t eat most cheeses (I don’t wanna hear about it) so I dislike these stuffed pockets of dough.

-Gemelli:

Taste: 10/10

Texture: 10/10

Tummy feel: 10/10

We frequent gemelli often in my house and it works well with plenty of dishes. They’re small so they’re not super filling, which is nice for lighter meals.

-Linguine:

Taste: 8/10

Texture: 8/10

Tummy feel: 8/10

Like spaghetti, linguine seems like a popular pick among most people. It’s good but plain flat noodles can be boring.

-Orecchiette:

Taste: 10/10

Texture: 9/10

Tummy feel: 10/10

This type of pasta, known as “little ears,” is pretty tasty. It holds sauce well but they can be hard to scoop up because they’re small.

-Gnocchi:

Taste: 10/10

Texture: 8/10

Tummy feel: 3/10

I like gnocchi but gnocchi doesn’t like me. I’ll only eat it if it’s not stuffed with anything, but it’s just so filling.

-Rigatoni:

Taste: 10/10

Texture: 9/10

Tummy feel: 8/10

Rigatoni is my brother’s favorite type of pasta. My dad’s side of the family makes it, but I haven’t had it in awhile.

-Macaroni:

Taste: 6/10

Texture: 6/10

Tummy feel: 7/10

I have somewhat of a problem with the shape of macaroni. They have a high dough-to-volume ratio and can be too chewy. You probably won’t see me eating macaroni.

-Lasagne:

Taste: 8/10

Texture: 9/10

Tummy feel: 8/10

Primarily used for lasagna, these noodles, evidently, play a key role. My mom’s side of the family makes fantastic lasagna.

-Tortellini:

Taste: 1/10

Texture: 2/10

Tummy feel: 2/10

I don’t like tortellini because they’re usually stuffed with cheese. Therefore, for similar reasons why I don’t like ravioli, they are ranked very low.

Bonus: Polenta:

Taste: 10/10

Texture: 9/10

Tummy feel: 8/10

While polenta isn’t pasta, this cornmeal blend that can either be mashed or sliced is so tasty. We’re having it more in my house now and it’s awesome.

Now, it’s my turn to make like a tree and get out of here. Arrivederci. Until next time my jokers! 

Reference: Me 🙂

Ciao everyone! Welcome, here’s another meme:

This is an easy 10/10 because this meme format is perfect. Although I wasn’t a big Jimmy Neutron kid, I respect the many memes made from the iconic characters. In fact, Jimmy’s own last name plays a part of the pun here.

Anyways, here we have back-to-back history posts, but I promise it won’t be a disaster, unlike Chernobyl…

According to Britannica, the Chernobyl disaster is the result of an accident at a Soviet Union nuclear power plant in 1986. In my own words, the USSR made a yikesy move.

Chernobyl, the name of the city containing the power plant, was located in Northern Ukraine, which was pretty deep inside the iron curtain. With four reactors, each capable of producing 1,000 megawatts of electric power, communist leaders were eager to keep this factory alive to fuel possible Cold War efforts.

It’s hard to say exactly what happened when reactor Unit 4 backfired on April 26th, 1986, since the government, at the time, did their best to cover up the occurring events.

I’m assuming there was mass panic among the technicians, who abruptly shut off most of the power, leaving only 7% power on, as reported by Britannica. I don’t know why they chose 7%, but the number doesn’t seem so lucky now.

The energy from the faulty reactor formed a large fireball, which eventually blew off its lid. Thus, the graphite reactor core let the pent-up radioactive material out of the melting unit. I think we can all agree that air + radioactive material = bad. Not so excellent…

While 30,000 inhabitants of Pryp’yat, the nearest city to Chernobyl, began to be evacuated, “Swedish monitoring stations reported abnormally high levels of wind-transported radioactivity and pressed for an explanation” (Britannica). Gottem.

Not really, actually. While the USSR sloppily swept this problem under the carpet, in fact, the real losers here were neighboring lands inside and outside the Soviet Union. Wind currents carried toxic waste over large areas, from Belarus, Russia, and Ukraine to non-USSR countries such as France and Italy. The number of casualties began to rise faster than Stalin’s original ascent to power.

With somewhere between two to fifty deaths from the physical reactor explosion, the effects of radiation poisoning spread. According to Britannica, “Millions of acres of forest and farmland were contaminated, and, although many thousands of people were evacuated, hundreds of thousands more remained in contaminated areas. In addition, in subsequent years many livestock were born deformed, and among humans several thousand radiation-induced illnesses and cancer deaths were expected in the long term.”

Basically, the air was more toxic than high school cliques. Politics were on fire at this point. The Chernobyl disaster was truly terrible and provenly killed more people than the atomic bombs in Hiroshima and Nagasaki combined. Man, the advancements of warfare.

But the fall of Chernobyl showed the absolute failure of the Soviet Union and their apparent weakness. The disaster conveyed the flaws of communism and the disadvantages of having such a terrible authoritarian reign. This, along with the inevitable shutdown of the last reactor in 2000, sent the old communist party packing. Of course, Russia’s government is highly controversial, but it’s insane to see how it changed over such a short period of time.

Now, it’s my turn to make like a tree and get out of here. Until next time my jokers!

Reference: “Chernobyl Disaster.” Edited by Encyclopædia Britannica, Encyclopædia Britannica,         

               Encyclopædia Britannica, Inc., 30 Nov. 2021, https://www.britannica.com/event/Chernobyl-

               disaster. 

Ciao everyone! Welcome back to the blog. Here’s another joke for you all:

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German are all watching an American street performer do some juggling. The juggler notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he stands on a wooden crate and calls out, “Can you all see me now?”

“Yes.”

“Oui.”

“Sí.”

“Ja.”

At first, I read this joke and didn’t get it, but after reading it out loud I thought it was funny. I rate it a 8.75/10. Phonetics man.

French, Spanish, and German all played a role in the evolution of the English language, which is the most spoken language in the world. Although I wish I was fluent in another language to blog about, I will stick to the creation of Modern English.

No no I won’t bore you with all the linguistic evidence (because I don’t think I could even comprehend it myself), but here’s the chronology of this language cocktail. Let’s see how the following languages played a role, as reported by the Oxford International English Schools:

German:

After the Jutes, Saxons and Angles invaded Great Britain after the 5th Century to acquire their land, the invaders spread their early Germanic language. This took over the old Celtic-based English spoken by the British. As Charlemagne’s empire grew, German spread, and the British vacated to modern-day Scotland and Ireland.

Old English:

Of course, with the decline of this empire and the rise of the Middle Ages, Old English was spoken among peasants. While still a blend of the Anglo-Saxon language, authors such as  Cynewulf and Aldhelm, who were leading figures in the world of Anglo-Saxon literature, contributed to its evolution. As leaders in Christian poetry, devoted religious followers, especially before the Crusades, learned Old English from the 5th to 10th century.

French (Latin):

The English language changed again between the 10th and 11th century, in which Norman invasions brought French elements to Old English. French, as a romance language, is derived from Latin, which was created circa the Roman Empire. So, it’s safe to say that the people of Gaul’s bastardization of Latin later created “Middle English.” 

Middle English:

Up until the 14th century, Middle English was spoken, especially after the publication of Geofrey Chaucer’s “Canterbury Tales.” This strayed from the Germanic roots and embraced the French-based English.

Modern-ish English:

Building off of Middle English, the Renaissance influenced Modern English. The cultural rebirth during this time, as well as increased worldliness, led to more infusion and variety of dialects, probably caused by increased tolerance. This is seen up until the 17th century. 

Spanish (Latin):

Around the same time Middle English and Modern-ish English were created, Spanish roots were mixed in. This can be attributed to Spanish Inquisition and colonization, with cultural diffusion’s prime in the 16th century. Natives and foreign explorers furthered the entanglement of several dialects in order to communicate.

Modern English (Current):

Around the 18th century, Shakespeare and the rise of the British Empire created the standards for Modern English. With West African, Native American, Spanish and European influences, Modern English became its own melting pot that was spread across the world through imperialism and military endeavors.

Woohoo English is great, but certain accents are really what make the language. This could be the sole topic of its own for a blog post.

Now, it’s my turn to make like a tree and get out of here. Until next time my jokers!

Reference: Oxford International English Schools. “A Brief History of the English Language.” Oxford                  International English Schools, Oxford International English Schools, 22 Oct. 2020,                       https://www.oxfordinternationalenglish.com/a-brief-history-of-the-english-language/.