I mainly received help on my thesis statement since I was too shy to read my whole piece, but I needed help with that anyway, so I think that worked out alright. I also needed help with my Conclusion, which was also achieved since I have a more established line of thinking to work with now. I think many student’s prose is much better than mine. Maybe this is because I haven’t yet really proofread or altered anything, & just sort of stream of consciousness type out my essay initially. I think I really want to incorporate what we suggested today into my essay, & maybe cut some of the quote analysis. I think that would make my paper stronger & more worth-reading, which will be beneficial in helping me choose my subject matter in future papers throughout my academic career. I browsed the Twitter account mentioned in class today about men reacting to the story, & may want to look into further content related to that subject matter to add to my desired point of male entitlement. I also still need to integrate interview content to meet my requirements, but I think doing so in the introduction as suggested would be best, as well as maybe in the conclusion to further my point- I’ll probably only put something in the bodies if it would really fit.

How I felt reading about all my cool classmates!

I really like all the different themes people have for their About Me pages! I liked looking at those before the name & thinking “Oh yeah, this is totally so&so’s blog” because their personalities come across through them! In that regard for mine I wonder if I should use a darker pink gif at the top, & see if I can make more of my blog theme black, since I like pink in a hot pink & black kind of way but I think my about page currently gives across white & a pastel/baby type of pink. A silly concern but for a visual element I’d have to see how I could change it! I also found it cute how some people included photos of themselves & would like to see if I could find a good one of me to do the same… since I think its also important for a reader to have an idea of who is talking to them, even if my audience at the moment is nobody who doesn’t already have an idea of me in their mind somewhere. I liked how Vivian’s was like sticky to the top but then dropped down, sometimes when I see my about page when I’m looking for an older post if mine I’m like Ahhh get out of the way I just want to find x post! but that’s a cool way of keeping it at the forefront but not in the way.

I think every about me was longer than mine which, granted mine is still a draft, made me remember I’m not very great at talking about myself. I enjoyed reading all of my peers & every one left me with thoughts like “Wow! They’re so cool” or “Wow! So much passion” or “Wow! It’s so cool to have a class with someone like this!” but I guess I can’t really imagine the same feeling being created when someone reads about me? That makes it sound a little depressing, but what I mean is I think when I talk about myself its brief & like surface-level, since I’m bad at telling what people care about or want to know & what they do not… but either way I think I should add more of Something.  I know I put a gif from my favorite media (Neon Genesis Evangelion) of all time at the bottom, so I can try to think about what draws me to that & pieces similar to it, because I think they cover some similar broad subject matter that might be interesting to hear about from a viewer.

I either want to write about objectification in “Cat Person”, or the expression of gender / gendered experiences in “Fun Home”

Objectification is a widely experienced phenomena spanning back as far as time may go, while particularly highlighted in modern culture, as the expansion of technology has made access to other’s & their bodies infinitely easier. Released in 2017, Kristen Roupenian’s short story “Cat Person” tells a tale of a “couple” meeting & falling apart, by the result of mutual objectification leaving desires unfulfilled & unsatisfied by both parties, but expressing the danger that comes from doing so as a woman. Capturing the the means in which a modern climate increases pre-existing notions of the hefty objectification that exists towards women, & the sense of entitlement men can never seem to shake in the process.

I want to add more between, since I also want it to include self-objectification, but that’s what I have for that one as of now.

Gender, as it is socially constructed, is an ever-changing & expanding form of expression for individuals. While socialization has a great impact on engendering, the family is one’s first exposure to all elements of life, & thus has a primary influence. Alison Bechdel presents an interesting case of engendering in her tragicomic “Fun Home”, which portrays her young life coming to terms with her identity as a butch lesbian despite feminizing efforts by her father, revealed to be a guise of projection from his closeted self.

I’m less sure about this one & how to alter it, but still I am curious about your thoughts on both, so I thought I should include both. Either way, I think there should be a focus on a call to activism, in the case of “Fun Home” & sexuality & gender expression, & in “Cat Person” against misogyny & the patriarchal values society upholds

This reading helped me remember that some people were not so dramatic for reacting the virus in extreme ways. Naturally I always felt bad there were people dying, & there were people around me who may be highly susceptible, but when there were so many people in my age group taking it as a joke & seeing each other only to play pretend sad afterwards got so annoying I stopped taking it seriously in a sense. I also feel specifically bad for little kids, because at much as it sucked for me to miss opportunities in high school, at least I can comprehend why, I feel like little kids will face huge developmental setbacks because of zoom education & face masks. I understand why it was necessary, of course, but I worry for them, & I hope its not as bad as they suspect. I couldn’t imagine being a parent & trying to explain to my little kids why they can’t go see their friends or family anymore, for who knew how long? That must’ve been terrible for a lot of people.

I also get the anxiety that came with it even when not sick. I’m a bit of a germaphobe, so whenever I’d get notice that anyone around me had it I’d go into a panic about whoever else I had been around who I had gotten sick (I was never sick) & face immense guilt for being “part of the problem”.

The idea that our adaptation being scary was one I never considered. Maybe because when I did online school kids understood it all better than teachers & could use that to their advantage, but its sad to me now that kids will probably never have a real snow day ever again. I don’t think people can entirely go to screen-based living, but the idea reminds me of my boyfriend, who really likes virtual reality. He says things along those lines sometimes, like wishing he could sleep in VR with a sky prettier & perhaps more realistic than the light-polluted one above our town, or when he said he could only understand a professor I was telling him about who never will take an airplane again after 9/11 & thus has no care about travelling, that if VR was a lot better & more immersive he wouldn’t need to either. But to me, who has used other peoples VRs occasionally, I don’t think it’ll ever be the same. Granted, he uses it infinitely times more than me, so maybe his idea for it’s future is better, but I can never see it being better than being able to actually experience things, & I think there are substantial amounts of people that think similarly to both of our idealologies, so long as there are portions against each other, it will never reach full immersion. I’m not sure! But it was very interesting regardless….1984esque too.. I can’t wait to hear everyone’s thoughts!

Kristen Roupenian’s “Cat Person” was incredibly realistic yet incredibly uncomfortable.

I think it did a good job of making you wonder who was more wrong for what they’re doing when all of it felt wrong. It’ll always be the older guy in my eyes, but it did a good job framing him as a decently nice guy most of the time, which I think is what partially made it so realistic. Though her intentions seemed ill from the get-go, like saying he was never the kind of guy she’d pursue at a party, the moments that made her actually swoon somewhat still felt believable. In the early bits I almost really sympathized with her when she’d talk about him being just attractive enough to be a class crush to overcome academic boredom, because I did the same in high school in classes that really bored me, towards people I could not care less about nor even really remember. Though, the way he made her feel felt evident from a viewer perspective that it wasn’t real romance, & she just liked the feeling of appreciation, & more evidently by the end the ego boost. This is very very obvious in the sex scene when she’s able to arouse herself by imagining how she must be amazing for him & he’s probably so grateful for the opportunity. I don’t think its wrong to want to feel desired like this, but reading it so explicitly almost made me wince at given moments, though I think its probably a feeling present in most people, even if not so extreme as it is for her. I think its fatherly issues to an extent, as “step-father” is mentioned but that’s all, & she only seems to “love” hi, when its mentioned he’s older & it’s mentioned how he sees her as something delicate & worth protecting, which is a role a father should typically take on.

I also think he was a realistic character as far as men work, since he seemed to play up the nice guy demeanor, but when it came down to things getting sexual & her leaving him, he took up the typical expectation of demanding, feeling as if they’re entitled to bodies or explanations. This in addition to his masculine appearance that’s described a few times (lumberjack-esque & whatnot) yet his heightened sensitivity to criticism from her. He also claimed to think she was older, but meeting her at her job that is a movie theater cashier, how old could you really have taken her for? It reminds me of that chart where as women age they find older men (as in their own age) attractive, yet men sort of lock in an age in the 18-26 range no matter how old they, themselves are. (attached below)

As much as many moments throughout it made my skin crawl or my heart want to dig a way out of my rib cage, the ending really sold that feeling within me. Just the validation of her suspicions throughout the whole work, even if not a murderer, he was not the greatest guy. Even though he said she was drunk, he still took her home. Even though he said it was okay she didn’t want a relationship, he demanded a response & demeaned & devalued her as soon as she didn’t give him what he felt like he was entitled to. I think this would be an interesting piece to write about in that way. The way you always sensed something would be up with him, but you didn’t have enough to prove it, just the feeling. I think that’s just a lot of what being a woman is by default, so I wonder if it could be written about as a potential essay topic. I’m not sure, but interesting to think about!

“It’s dangerous downtown, it’s always been that way, just stick with what you know, stay at the Carlyle. ” Change has been a very big factor throughout this course, & the idea of sticking with what you know vs. branching out made this quote stick out to me. What’s really “right” & “wrong” is so subjective too, its hard to find any sort of compromise between those set in their ways & those who desire to explore/experiment.

“‘Well, how the hell did you mean it?'” With just having read “Citizen”, this stuck out to me, the ignorant comments with seemingly no other possible intention that poke out in people’s moments of panic..

The different reactions to the attacks presented in “Escape from New York” were all very interesting to see, especially since it comes back to the fact all three of them are “escaping” together. It was also funny seeing a town I live somewhat close to mentioned in a work like this… I thought it was cool that Alison Bechdel was from Pennsylvania but it wasn’t anywhere all that close to me– but Bethlehem is pretty around me I was like Woah!

“And hearing Marlon scared made Michael as scared as he’d been all day. You never want to see your father scared, or your mother cry, and, as far as Michael’s chosen family went, that’s exactly what was happening right now” I like the reference to them all being a little family like in the times of tragedy, even if they’re talking about the fear now all of them were facing. Its also an interesting take on how paranoia spreads like wildfire oftentimes, even to the “logical” oriented ones like Marlon. Also, is it vaguely conceited to think you’d make a good “trophy on someone’s wall” or are they really important? I thought they were just some group of friends but maybe I missed an important line somewhere. They also call it the “apocalypse” frequently but isn’t that really dramatic ?? or were people genuinely thinking it could reach that extremity with 9/11 & I don’t understand it because I wasn’t around.

I don’t know. I didn’t like this one too much. Maybe I missed something but it kind of felt boring to me. They didn’t really do much & what they did do wasn’t very exciting, mainly just bickering & such.. which is fine but not for attention grabbing reasons I guess? Not for me at least.

I liked “Meet the President” more though, as I think futuristic concepts with cool tech involved are interesting, even if their guesses aren’t accurate whatsoever (like 80s shows thinking we’d have flying cars by 2010 type stretches). The commentary on many key elements of global culture right now was also very neat to read, ranging from economic issues to industrialization & stuff, I also think pieces on class disparities are interesting which this one could be counted as I feel like, since even though its futuristic, not everyone had the same access & opportunity as this kid did, much still like the modern climate. & similarly those in a place of privilege being completely blind to the struggles of those beneath them..tough…. but he learned a little something out there at least. I also find the idea of virtual worlds / virtual reality cutting off real people from the real world so tragic yet so fascinating.. which also drew me to this story more. I think its scary how digitized we want to make everything, & that its very sad when people see nothing to this beautiful world we were given… obviously I know its not sunshine & rainbows & there are several huge huge huge issues that need to be dealt with, but nature in general & humanity as a whole I find so beautiful & fascinating.. I don’t get why anyone would want to give that up entirely- but I could also say I know its because I would’ve loved to escape to a fantasy world when I was younger instead of my reality too, so maybe I should sound more sympathetic.

I didn’t expect to be able to breeze through the first half in terms of language, its written in a way that is very easy to stay hooked to in my opinion. Content wise it obviously covers some pretty intense subject matters, so in terms of that I reread a few sections in order to ensure I felt as though I could understand them as best as I could. I can’t relate to it myself as a white person that very much looks like it (I’ve seen people get mistaken as other races & face senseless discrimination, so I say this to say I don’t have to think about race & my presentation of self whatsoever), but I think its important for marginalized groups to share experiences like this so those who don’t have to think about the things others are discriminated against for can see what they’re going through. I think ignorance is a terrible thing, but some people simply cannot register that things like the subject of Citizen still happen if they aren’t happening directly in front of them. By this I mainly think about how while people may know that, obviously, the KKK-aligned man from the coffee shop is racist, but would see less or no problem with comments & calls thrown at Serena Williams, & will use her reactions to such things as proof of being “dramatic” or “overly sensitive”. I thought the whole portion around Serena was very interesting, even though I really don’t care about tennis. I also find it very admirable she keeps up with it & being the best despite all the hardships she had to face in getting to where she was (is?). But, I also thought it was important that the work included seemingly small-scale acts of racism (such things don’t exist, racism is just racism, but I mean like small not-news-covered acts of injustice) as well, since obviously not every black person is Serena Williams famous. Just going out in many places puts them at incredibly high risk of discrimination, no cameras or fame required. From being called the name of the only other black person someone may know, to being yelled at in public over nothing, to being seen as angry in a photo for having a relaxed expression as a black person. Its terrible what society does to people over something so stupid. But that leads into one quote I really liked: “Every look, every comment, every bad call blossoms out of history, through her, onto you.” (32), meaning even without the attention on each individual in particular, those of color who are’s discrimination’s ring through everyone’s ears- like how can they even get there when she’s the best & still thought of like this? mocked like this? screwed over like this? It’s terrible.

Some other quotes I found interesting include:

“it is also acting that you have a destination that doesn’t include acting like this moment isn’t inhabitable,” (10)

“a disappointment in the sense that non amount of visibility will alter the ways in which one is perceived.” (24)

“Perhaps this is how racism feels no matter the context–randomly the rules everyone else gets to play by no longer apply to you, and to call this out by calling out “I swear to God!” is called insane, crass, crazy. Bad sportsmanship.” (30)

“…imitating that any relationship between the white viewer and the black artist immediately becomes one between white persons and black property,” (34)

“in a day’s fun” / “all in good fun” came up a few times to downplay racism, which goes hand-in-hand with the quote above, I think. Black people becoming an object for white amusement rather than people. As well as “Forget all that, the world says.” (61)

“The world is wrong. You can’t put the past behind you. It’s buried in you; it’s turned your flesh into it’s own cupboard.” (63)

“…nor do you care. For all your previous understandings, suddenly incoherence feels violent. You both experience this cut, which she keeps insisting is a joke, a joke stuck in her throat, and like any other injury, you watch it rapture along its suddenly exposed suture.” (42)

“Only then do you realize you are among ‘the others out in public’ and not among ‘friends.'” (48)

“I feel most colored when I’m thrown against a sharp white background”

“Though you can retire with an injury, you can’t walk away because you feel bad.” (65)

I also found the page variance in the list of lives lost to police brutality really powerful. I remember in the classroom there were at least three different prints of the pages. It’s incredibly upsetting that the list keeps growing & to express that gruesome fact in a way that calls attention to it is important.

Questions:

-Why did the mother only share that her father was seeing minors only after Alison came out? Did she think she was also going to become predatory, or just explaining why she thought it was wrong, or something else?

-Why did Alison wait to tell her mom about her period?

-Did Alison really suspect autism in the whole family, or just herself & that was kind of an off-hand comment about the neurodivergent nature that was at least somewhat apparent in all of them?

-What are her brothers like? We don’t hear much about them.

-How did she become fully convinced her dad committed suicide?

I quite like the open nature of this book. It’s as though things aren’t entirely secrets rather things she just hasn’t told us yet. I enjoy the illustration, & enjoy reading lots of graphic novels, so it isn’t really hard to get through. Though, it is interesting as the language she uses seems beyond regular graphic novels, which- from my experience- usually use simpler language, but I like that it’s like this. It kind of goes to show it isn’t really a regular graphic novel, but something more than that.

Comments on her suspicion as to whether or not her father’s death was an accident is really intriguing, though considering her opening said that he killed himself I wonder if she got more concrete evidence in the future, or just gained complete confidence in her guess. The way she processes his death & goes about “mourning” by being irritated by pity I think is a bit relatable, though I can’t say I have anyone I think I’d be in such an extreme case of as her. Though her feelings towards her dad going back & forth through appreciation & resentment is a relatable feeling as well.

I’m really interested in how she describes the almost two sides of the same coin like nature between her experience as a lesbian compared to her dad being a closeted gay man. The sex & gender discussions that could come about in thinking about such a thing are really cool, & I think I might want to try to focus on something like that if I’m able to when the essay writing comes around.

i also really enjoyed the open discussion of neurodivergent behaviors, specifically a detailed retelling of her experience with OCD symptoms as well as the suspicion her & her family may be on the autistic spectrum. I think discussion about this in an honest manner is really important in

                    A relatable LGBTQ+ experience no matter the time period

media of all kinds, & seeing it talked about like so is very important representation- as well as the topics around both her & her dad’s sexuality. Both elements are relatable in a larger sense, but this is my blog so I can say they are relatable to me personally! Both being LGBTQ+, less in the secretive way both Alison & her dad lived though, which I am thankful I don’t have to hide elements of myself like that. At least in that way, in terms of neurodivergence, I can’t be really open about it. I highly suspect I have at least a few disorders, but like Alison’s parents it’s not totally something that can be grasped by my family, & they use their own means of “fixing” my behaviors rather than looking into getting a diagnosis & learning to understand my experience. I think this was very isolating when I was younger, but there are many resources available modernly & more of an openness around discussing mental health & a generally more positive approach in discussing them, so I still I’m still thankful in that regard as well.

I wonder if in the remaining chapters more about her dad & his relations impacted himself, her, & the family altogether may come around. It’s been talked about or at least referenced around, but there’s not a full discussion on it all between anyone that I recall.. just the news from the phone call with her mom. I don’t know, but I’m very excited to finish this piece & have enjoyed it all so far!

In our peer review we had someone read what they wrote, then receive feedback based on the plus comments & question mark comments method described. There was good feedback on what was done well, & there was no real negative talk but rather this is good, here’s what I think can make it even better sorts of thinking.

I felt really bad I didn’t have a full draft like everyone else, & I think I should definitely work on being more prepared so I could receive more feedback that will help me out in the future. I received compliments on at the very least having framework for my body paragraphs, but I don’t think that counts as being better, since it still isn’t real content & is more so simply because my brain has trouble writing any other way in a somewhat effective manner.

For revising I definitely have to actually develop & write out the rest of my work, but I think discussion today really helped me find new ideas & sorts of areas for inspiration in however I go about writing the rest of my essay.

I’ve reached a bit of a road block so I do not believe this will be my whole introduction by any means, but its a start nonetheless:

Mohsin Hamid’s political thriller “The Reluctant Fundamentalist” follows narrator Changez’s- a heir of a once-well-established family in Pakistan- discussions with an unknown traveling companion- referred to only as “You”- that retells his journey in establishing himself as a successful uptaker of the American dream as means of connecting with the foreigner visiting his nation. What begins as pleasant small-esque talk upon meeting quickly turns into a more deep & confounding recollection of Changez’s crucial changes in character & deteriorations of his own identity by consequence of many elements of American culture. Changez’s lighthearted storytelling can be interpreted as merely that, but below the surface many ugly facets of American ideals taint Changez to an extent truly unknown to the audience, & only vaguely touched on by Changez himself, yet his changes in character are apparent nonetheless. 

I’d like to focus on the ways the American Dream seemed to force Changez to change in character, as well as looking at the extent of such things (influencers & changers). Thinking in terms of character building, his relationships, alienation/loneliness, social change, inner turmoil, etcetc. I hope to have it more fleshed out soon, & I’m excited to get to start thinking about this work more again!