Middle school is a time I am sure most of us never want to revisit. The awkward things we did, said, and wore should never be relieved. I, however, have very different reasons for wanting to forget those unpleasant years. It was eighth grade when I told my mom I was gay. Now I was not disowned and forced to find my own way in the world, where I would face hardship after hardship; instead, I was told there was no way I could know that, I had never had sex with a girl, I was too young to make that choice. My mom swiftly tossed that three-letter word under the rug by saying, “we will revisit this when you’re eighteen.” I had already gone through trying to accept myself as gay before I ever thought about telling my mom, which is why nothing she said that night ever kept me awake. For the next three years, I would be fully accepting of my identity, in school, with friends, and even girlfriends, but at home, I was forced to remain the perfect daughter my mother wanted. I felt as though I was suffocating the second I walked through my front door, obligated to wear a mask of the girl my family wanted me to be. I quickly learned to ignore the suffocation, I accepted this was how my life was going to be until it was time to, “revisit this when I’m eighteen.” In fact, my first girlfriend was known to my Family as Mark, and let us just say Mark was not worthy enough to meet the parents. I lived my double life, which is not as fun or cool as Hollywood likes to make it seem, until my senior year. My best friend, Chloe, was practically a member of my family, although we had not been friends for more than a couple of months at this point, she had even gone on two of our family Disney trips. Our relationship quickly turned from close friends to something quite stronger. At first, we were okay with keeping that aspect of our relationship a secret, we were on the same team, her dad was our coach, and of course, we knew my mom’s opinions. Neither of us wanted to deal with drama before we had been given a chance to see if we could work. Eventually, Chloe graduated and it was getting more and more difficult to hide who we were. I told my mom I was gay. Again. She stated the same things she said the first time, except this time with the added pizzaz of, “you’re just confused! She’s your best friend!” I simply told her If she wanted to keep under the rug she could, but I would not. Then something happened that I never thought would. I live in a pretty religious area and I have dealt with my fair share of ignorant comments about “my choices”, nothing quite as bad as what I faced fall of my senior years, weeks after finally being fully out. Two girls on my team, who I thought were good friends, decided my identity was too vulgar for them and that my actions were offensive. They made up rumor after rumor and these rumors almost removed me from a team that had been my home when I didn’t feel comfortable in my own. I was shattered I thought I was going to be left with nowhere to call home, but then, the last person I expected to come to my rescue did. My mom came into the situation blazed with anger because someone was trying to hurt her daughter, a daughter who never in a million years thought her mom would accept her. When my momma bear of a mom was through I had not one home restored, but two. This I believe, with time and patience anyone can overcome prejudice.
Madison, first off this is such a touching story. I don’t live in an area that is super religious so I often forget that even now a days people can still face blowback about who they are. What you had to go through must have really sucked, and you are so strong for pushing through that. I like the way you told the story as each sentence has it own purpose. I really like the overall message, and think you could record it as it is. Keep up the great work!
Madison, this was a very powerful story. While reading it, I went through a range of emotions and it seemed like I could feel how stressful this time of your life must have been. I am happy that your mom finally came around to accept you for who you are. I think this is written brilliantly and ready to record.
Madison,
thanks for making this story what you’ll share for your TIB assignment.
It’s a powerful story, but I think you can work on sentence structure and flow. It reads like the story just poured out of you and I think you can do some editing and revision that will really strengthen this and make particular points stand out in very powerful ways.
A great draft.