I’m not 100% sure on my topic yet, but here is what I currently have:
Millions of Americans struggle with diabetes and need to rely on buying insulin to keep themselves alive. As with many drugs, insulin prices have skyrocketed since its introduction into the market and have become too pricy for some. In 2023, Medicare and Eli Lilly both put a cap on insulin at $35. However, the job is not finished. Medicare only affects seniors, and Eli Lilly is just one supplier of insulin. With life and death quite literally on the line, insulin prices must be capped nationwide by a Congressional mandate. Americans have suffered for far too long trying to keep themselves, their children, and their relatives alive.
Hi Michael, great job!
1. I liked this title. I think that you come of rather strong in the first paragraph, rightfully so as this is a very pressing issue. I would maybe add the word “Necessary” or something that shows how a solution (like a price cap) is gravely needed.
2. I can clearly see that the exigence is people not getting the insulin that they need due to the extremely high prices. You outlined the reasons in an effective way, and I was immediately right with you about this problem. I liked how you brought in Medicare and Eli Lily, as it is true that these are both a small fix for such a big problem. I think that this comment could be a great gateway into talking about corrupt systems or healthcare (regarding insulin) at large.
3. I thought that this was a great two scentence thesis. It showed readers what should be done, and the consequences that are liable to happen if not. I liked how I knew immediately what the policy was, and I think that the argument will unfold beautifully.
Your title gets right to the point about what your issue brief topic will be about. I think instead of “advocating” though you could be more specific about how the insulin price cap will be established. For example, you could include the part of the Congressional mandate in your title..
I feel that you first sentence really shows why insulin needs to have a cap by letting people know how many Americans require insulin. I think it would be nice to add some more numbers on just how high the price of insulin has risen, and this could tie into the average American’s income which may not be able to support buying insulin at those high prices.
I think your thesis is clear and sets up your argument nicely. Later in the brief, you could discuss what the cap should be because if the cap is still too high, then it won’t be very effective.
1). Comment on the title. How does it offer a way forward on the issue? Does it hint at or echo the paper’s thesis? Make suggestions.
I am really excited to hear about this pressing issue of unjust insulin prices, but feel the title could be enhanced. To create a greater sense of urgency, I suggest editing the title to be along the lines of “Americans Need an Affordable Insulin Price Cap” or “Insulin Prices Continue to Rise; A Price Cap Would Help to Lower Costs”.
2). Does this piece’s title and introduction respond to an exigence?-Does it make the issue pressing or connect to other pressing needs and issues? Make suggestions.
I do believe there is an exigence that this paper responds to, but would suggest making it more clear. For example, you could edit the opening sentence to say something like “every year, (some specific number of americans) suffer from Diabetes. With insulin prices reaching as high as (top numbers) and averaging (average price), many diabetics are unable to obtain the medications they need to stay healthy.
3). Comment on the thesis. Does it set up a clear argumentative claim? Is it advancing a specific policy or practice? Can you imagine how the rest of the argument will unfold?
I think your thesis is great as it specifically mentioned that congress needs to implement a price cap for insulin sales across the nation.
This is also a side note, but when you have to analyze potential downfalls of your suggested policy change, you could talk about how insulin producers may suffer from a price maximum and how that may drive producers out of the insulin production industry, creating a shortage.
I’m looking forward to seeing the final product!