Have you ever pondered how, after you eat Sour Patch Kids, you can say that you’ve “eaten children?” I mean, you ate a Sour Patch Kid or “child” and saying so is certainly one way to get involved in a murder case. Either way, this thought did not cross my mind until I listened to my friend practice for a speech and debate tournament. They were doing impromptu where you got a topic and developed a speech within a few minutes. As I watched people rant about random topics and pull ideas out of thin air (like the argument that Sour Patch Kids were inappropriately named), I realized the importance of being able to improv not only in speeches but in real life applications.

Lesson #4: Improv

Imagine that somehow, you got yourself cornered by someone attempting to harm or kidnap you. There is no set way to defend yourself. Yes, there are helpful tips such as SING and other defensive tactics, but none are 100% effective. Now, what happens when one doesn’t work?

If you try to punch to the groin and it misses, do you freeze? Try for another spot? Attempt an escape? These are split second decisions made in a life-or-death scenario, and a part of self-defense is being able to think quickly. Hence, improv.

While I can’t teach you how to think faster or what to do, I can give you a few tips.

Tip 1: Distraction. Screaming and pointing at something as a distraction can work when used correctly. If you shouted for help from an imaginary cop, perhaps the attacker would check over their shoulder, giving you enough time to either attack them or slip away. It sounds utterly ridiculous, but they don’t call it the oldest trick in the book for nothing. Now, I’m not saying everyone will fall for it, but even a split second could make a huge difference in escaping to safety. You could even just start screaming. Making noise and drawing attention is the last thing any assailant wants, which might make them flee in case anyone heard.

Tip 2: Everything is a weapon. Anything and everything can be turned into a weapon for a slight advantage. For example, a pen. Stab the sharp end into someone’s hand, and they’ll be howling in pain. A key? Jab that in someone’s ribs. Even a bit of hand sanitizer in someone’s eye can have the same effect as pepper spray. So, think about what you might have in your hand or pocket and how you could use it.

Tip 3: Exploit vulnerable areas. An often-overlooked option is grabbing a finger. If someone is grabbing onto you, try to grab their pinky finger and bend. Suddenly, a full-grown man is on their knees in pain. Additionally, we have discussed SING in detail (solar plexus, instep, nose, and groin), but there are plenty of other sensitive spots such as the eyes, ears, knees, and neck. Any strong strike to these areas will startle your opponent. A swift kick to the knee puts them off balance. Pulling on their ear, especially if they have a piercing, will certainly hurt. The options are nearly endless and can be used in a multitude of situations.

Again, depending on the scenario, these tips may or may not work. Perhaps, your yelling didn’t attract help or your attacks didn’t land. Then, it’s time for improv. Pick another tactic. Never stop trying something new. The point of these blogs is to build your arsenal of options so that if you ever need to improv a self-defense plan, you have the tools to do so.