Double Standards

Feminism is a hot topic nowadays. and with the topic of feminism comes a lot of discussion of double standards as you cross gender lines, so lets discuss some of them.

1. dating: a huge thing that gets discussed in terms of men and women is actual dates. The common argument is that women want to be treated as equals in a relationship and in general, but still expect men to hold doors for them, buy them drinks, pay for dates, and things of that nature. To be completely honest, I agree with this argument. It is unfair that we are offended by some gender discriminations and expect others. Personally, I like having doors held for me and guys fighting me to get the bill, and if that means I’m expected to put on a pretty skirt and bat my eyelashes, it’s a small price to pay.

2. objectification: Men and women by nature objectify members of the opposite sex. It’s inevitable. However, women take it much more personally than men. We have reached a point in which women get mad when someone says they look nice. It’s ridiculous, While I do understand that women do not want to be viewed as nothing more than sexual objects, we have come a long way from being practically enslaved sexually to our husbands. I do not think it is demeaning, for example, for a guy to say that a girl has a nice ass. To me, there’s little difference between that and saying a girl has pretty eyes or nice hair. It’s a compliment. Just take it as that.  While women are angry about being objectified, we are just as guilty of objectifying men. Why is it a crime against humanity for a guy to say he doesn’t like overweight women, but it’s perfectly okay for women to say that they want a man who is tall, dark, and handsome. I’m not saying it’s right for anyone to objectify the opposite sex by their physical appearance, but we need to acknowledge that it comes from both sides.

3. Being “K”-ed: I write about this one upon request from my guy friends. Girls are notorious for their texting woes. Any time you are short with a girl or, heaven forbid, respond with just a “K,” you better watch your back. I don’t know what it is about this particular letter, but it just strikes a chord with that second x chromosome. And yet, whenever a girl is mad, all they do is respond with short, meaningless (and quite frankly confusing) messages. For some reason, we think no matter what we are in the right and it is the other person’s job to give in and gain our forgiveness. And might I add this causes a particular conflict when you have two girls fighting with each other. We all know we do it, and yet none of us change.


Sorry girls, but we kinda suck. Let’s try and get our acts together. And I know this entire post is basically bashing women, but hey, the title of this blog is The Modern Misogynist.


And if I’m not mistaken, this will be my last post (crying emoji). It’s been an honor and a privilege to criticize and insult you. Thanks for reading.


Facial hair is a topic of heated debate among college men. They’re just approaching that age where they can finally grow their beard so that it covers all of the desired area, and many guys explore the possibilities of their facial hair. Here are my personal top 5 facial hair designs.

1. Full facial scruff: maintained scruff is my personal weakness in terms of facial hair. I don’t know why, but I just think it looks great. Number one in my book in terms of facial hair.

1. Clean Shaven:  this is tied with full facial scruff because it depends on the person. Some people look better clean shaven, and some people look better with scruff. I don’t know what causes one or the other, but both look pretty good

2. Long beard: The motif of this post for facial hair (in case you haven’t noticed) is maintenance. A long beard with mustache as long as it is not unkempt looks decent on a good amount of people, but not everyone. It takes a certain type of guy to pull it off (basically people who can grow them), but as far as I can tell, guys tend to know whether or not they can pull off this look. Again, keep it trimmed though.

3. Goatee: Goatee’s actually work on the majority of people.  That is, when paired with a connecting mustache, otherwise it’s not very attractive. However, if you want to have a goatee, it cant be too long. Then it’s just awkward. Keep it clean.

4. Chin Strap Beard: I’m not sure how I feel about chinstrap beards. Most of the time they’re not completely terrible, but sometimes they just look downright douchey. It’s difficult territory, so tread lightly.


5. Mustache: If you only have a mustache and are under the age of 45, it doesn’t work. I’m sorry. It just doesn’t. Stop trying. You’re probably scaring small children. Shave.


6. Beard with no mustache: some people can pull it off, but you probably can’t. Sad, but true. Sorry I’m not sorry.

7. Neckbeard: I have seen exactly one person ever that can pull off a neckbeard and even that is a bit of a stretch. If you cannot grow hair above your jawline, I recommend staying clean shaven.

8. Soul patch: unless you are a hillbilly banjo player, I’m not sure why you would ever consider growing a soulpatch. Just do us all a favor and don’t.

9. Sideburns: No. Go home. Stop. Rethink your life choices. Go to church. Call your mom.

10. Mutton Chops: I had a history teacher who had mutton chops. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night screaming because of them.


Facial hair is a form of expression for some guys, so, honestly, you do you. Try out whatever you want. Have fun while your grandmother isn’t around to yell at you for it. Maybe you’re that one person who can pull it off. It’s unlikely, but who am I to tell you how to frame your face.

Intimidation and Introduction

To start out this post, I want to give you a back story for why I am writing about it. And I don’t think I’m the only one who’s experienced this.

So there is this guy that I see EVERYWHERE. No exaggeration, I see him an average of 3 times a day in random places. Obviously, I do not know this person. I do not know his name or anything about him save for where he is at a few times during the day. With only awkward eye contact as my evidence, I have a hard time believing he hasn’t noticed me and/or thought I’m stalking him. Regardless of the fact that I think he’s pretty attractive, I feel like we see each other enough in a day that the only logical thing to do would be to introduce myself. However, I have no idea how to go about this.

If you talk to basically any guy on campus, they will say that they would absolutely love if a girl just randomly walked up to them and introduced herself. And while most girls realize that, we still are very uncomfortable with the idea of starting up a conversation with a guy we don’t even know.

There’s so much that I don’t understand about this phenomenon. Why is it that girls can go up to a random girl and say how much they love her hair/scarf/shoes/whatever and yet can’t introduce themselves to a guy? What do we expect? I don’t think any guy is going to respond poorly to a girl talking to him unsolicited. Sure, it might be awkward, but does it really matter?

Now, some people may say that guys are in the same boat, seeing as guys are often hesitant to introduce themselves to girls. But there’s some sense to that. At least on this campus, girls have a tendency to assume that any guy that takes 12 seconds to have a conversation with her is trying to sleep with her, and respond accordingly. Most of the guys I know have plenty of stories where they do something as simple as ask a girl a question about class and have her respond with a snip about having a boyfriend. Regardless of how presumptuous a reaction this is to have, it happens. And I understand that it can be humiliating. So guys, I can see how you would be hesitant to introduce yourself to a girl. But girls, what’s our excuse?

Now, I don’t have any sort of an answer to this problem. I’m just as awkward as everyone else. So to this, I ask you, fellow classmates, what is the big stigma with introductions? Is it our tendency to fall back on technology that deters us from real honest-to-God conversation? And additionally, if you are a guy, would you be okay with a girl randomly walking up to you and starting a conversation? What is the best way to go about it? Is it creepy to say that you’ve noticed someone around? Why do I have so many questions? Why is this so awkward? Help?

All anyone’s been able to talk about recently is the events which transpired at the Kappa Delta Rho fraternity. I know a lot of us are getting sick of hearing/reading/talking about it, so if you’re one of those people I suggest skipping this post.

Last week, Onward State published an article calling on the betterment of how women are treated at Penn State (linked here). While Melissa McCleery does a great job discussing the issue, I would like to go into further depth on this issue.

As disappointing as it is, I would be shocked to find out that what happened at Kappa Delta Rho is an isolated incident. The issue of privacy in this digital age is a large one. Millennials, for one, seem to not know the definition of the word. We have all heard the comments by the KDR member who spoke out, but in case you haven’t, he described the pictures to be posted as “satire” (interview here). While it remains to be debated whether or not this person knows the true definition of the word, it’s easy to see what he’s trying to say. The individuals who choose to post photos such as these find it humorous. They make slut-shaming a game. However, college kids are not the only culprits. It seems as though every other week some celebrity’s revealing photos are leaked for the world to see. There are entire sites dedicated to posting the photos of ex-girlfriends. It’s sickening. And with recent technology advancements, its easier than ever. While I personally love Snapchat, it supports privacy infringement in stride. Many people use the application to send provocative photos, banking on the promise that once the picture has been viewed, it will be deleted. However, snapchat still allows the receiving party to take a screenshot of the photo, and after that nothing can be done to retrieve it. It also allows for the possibility of people, such as the members of KDR to send pictures without a trace. Imagine if these young men had simply been taking snapchats of these women and sending them to their brothers instead of posting them. How could they be caught?

It’s scary to think about, but it’s possible that things like this do happen without our knowledge. Thankfully, pictures posted with the intention of getting a laugh or recognition tend to be posted on a more permanent platform, thus allowing these images to be traced. However, who’s to say people don’t send snapchats to their friends of the person they hooked up with asleep next to them?

I do not intend to scare, but it’s something that we need to think about. Whether pictures such as these are taken to be funny or to brag about getting laid, it’s wrong. The KDR member in the interview stated that this incident is not a legal issue, but why shouldn’t it be? It is one ladder rung below pornography, and it is a non-consensual sexual act. In my opinion, there is no reason for it not to be considered a legal matter. Whether or not these people are considered criminals, it’s about time we step up as a society and take a stand against blatant invasion of privacy.

Gruelling Group Work

We all have experienced the fun which comes from group projects. With every project you do as a group, you will take on a role which often varies depending on timing, nature of the project, class, etc.

1. The Figure Head: This person is often the most dominant personality in the group. They are known for taking over the conversation and sticking to their guns. Often, this person does most of the talking and idea-making. This person is an asset in that they often have a good understanding of what they are talking about, making them useful in oral presentations. More than anything, though, they take the lead on answering questions that most of us don’t want to answer.

2. The Micro-Manager: Known for being incredibly annoying and always on your case, this person has a love/hate relationship with the rest of the group. They will push you to make sure your part is done which can be irritating, but at the end of the day, they are the person who is going to make sure that all of the work is done right and submitted on time.

3. The Submissive One: This group member often gets by under the radar by simply doing what they’re told. You won’t hear much from them in the working process, but you can always count on them to get the job done to satisfaction.

4. The Confused One: This person is easily the most underrated group member. This person will ask tons of questions which may get on your nerves, but is actually really helpful. By talking through these questions, you gain a better understanding of the work you are doing and the group can make sure they are on the same page.

5. Devil’s Advocate: This is the arguer of the group. Most of the things they say will start with the words “Just to play Devil’s advocate”, which will make you cringe, but is ultimately a good thing. This person provides insight that you may not have considered and forces you to work through the kinks in your project.

6. The Busy One: This is the one you can never get a hold of, and often has other things to do whenever you want to meet. I’d love to say that they contribute meaningfully to the group, but mostly they just put their name on the final project.

7. The Tech-ey One: Often, this group member is the work mule of the group. They have a better understanding of the medium you are using for your project and they know it. They are content taking the reigns on the technology aspect and make sure everything looks as good as possible.

8. The Wild Card: Sadly, every group has one. This is just a person that despite lots of discussion just kinda does their own thing. This can fare either really well or really poorly. If you’re lucky, it’ll diversify your project just enough to make it effective. However, much of the time it just compromises the cohesiveness of the project.

Swipe Right

Let’s talk about an emerging medium of social interaction: Dating apps.

I’m not going to lie, I love them. I think they’re great. And kind of hilarious.

1. Hot or Not: I can’t really decide whether this is actually a dating app or merely a self esteem validator, but nonetheless, it’s kinda fun. There is an endless stream of members of the opposite sex (or same sex, up to you) and you just say whether you find them attractive or not. And like all of them, once you both rate each other “hot” you can message from there. Personally, I would have to give this app a “not” because there’s no way of validating your profile information or age setting. And honestly I just don’t really like the formatting.

2. Coffee Meets Bagel: Honestly, I think this is a really great app if you’re interested in legitimately meeting someone you could have a connection with. The app takes into account your interests and preferences, and, using your facebook profile, supplies one candidate everyday around noon. This candidate normally has a number of mutual facebook friends and meets the criteria you deem important. You are allowed to see their age, pictures, mutual friends, and interests, but not their name which I find to be very interesting. Overall it’s a great app, again, if you’re actually looking for a date.

3. Bristlr: This one’s kind of the black sheep of the list, but I thought I’d include it just for fun. Basically, it’s specified for men with beards and women looking for men with beards. So you are legitimately just shown guys with beards within a predetermined radius and decide whether they’re attractive or not and they do the same. I’m not going to lie, I downloaded this app just kinda to see what it was and was kinda bored by it. Maybe it’ll take off, but for the moment there’s not that many people on there and the one’s who are aren’t really in the age range most of us would be interested in.

4. Tinder: My personal favorite. I have had a Tinder profile since about my junior year of high school and, I’m not going to lie, I’m kind of obsessed with it. Originally, I was one of those girls who used it just as a self esteem boost, but honestly the people on there are hilarious. Many people have trouble hitting on people in person, but when you add the cover of a cell phone, all bets are off. You get some very elaborate, entertaining, and sometimes just scary pick up lines and even better conversation. Now, it’s something of a time killer.

But with Tinder, you need to take some precaution. First and foremost, stranger danger. Tinder takes all of your information and pictures from a facebook profile in order to deter false info, but that doesn’t necessarily protect you. If you use it and plan to meet up with someone, use your internet stalking skills to try and make sure they’re real. Google, google, google. And never meet them off the grid. Meet in a public place and always tell a friend where you’re going, what you’re doing, etc. Also, Tinder  has become a very popular app, so you WILL find people you know. There’s no ifs and or buts about it. You will. So know your strategy. If you swipe right (the attractive option), there’s some possible mixed messages and awkwardness. However if you swipe left (the reject option), you risk offending them, thus creating awkwardness again. Personally, I have taken the rule to swipe right on every single person I know, because I love awkwardness. But if you choose to do the same, prepare to be hit on by some people you kind of know, or have some tension the next time you see them in person. Finally, mostly the worst thing that can happen to you on tinder (besides actual physical danger) is having someone recognize you in person. It’s WEIRD. For some reason guys find it socially acceptable to message you saying they saw you somewhere IRL, and, honestly, it’s kind of stalker-y. If you recognize someone, please keep it to yourself.

Overall, I think dating apps are fun. Granted, I don’t actually use them for dating, but they’re certainly entertaining. If you’ve already beaten candy crush and are getting sick of trivia crack, I recommend them.

Valentine’s Day

Whether to you it’s Valentine’s Day or Single’s Awareness Day, it’s coming up.

Valentine’s Day is a lot like New Year’s Eve (besides having poorly regarded movies despite an A-list-saturated cast). Both holidays are hyped up for weeks, only creating high expectations which inevitably are left unmet.

Now, I hate the “Hallmark-Created Holidays” preachers as much as the next person, but out of all the conspiracy theorists out there, these have the most valid point. Men shell out hundreds of dollars on drug store chocolates adorned in red tin foil and reject teddy bears that give you recurring nightmares. (Don’t act like you haven’t seen them). It’s just absurd.

First of all, since when does a stuffed animal and a box Russell Stover’s count as a romantic gesture? If you and your significant other subscribe to the Valentine’s Day hype, then do it right. It may sound cliche, but do something that actually comes from the heart. Even a Hallmark card with a nice handwritten message inside goes further than a 3 foot stuffed animal with a bear-related pun.

I know it’s difficult to do big romantic gestures from a dorm room, so here are some suggestions for your and your SO this V-day.

1. Don’t overshoot it. Not everyone needs a big romantic evening, and you should know whether or not your SO is one of those people. Instead of a big romantic dinner or home-cooked meal, why not go to Baby’s and share a milkshake? Just enough cliche, but it won’t cost you 2 weeks pay.

2. Take advantage of our surroundings. As of now, it’s supposed to snow on Saturday in State College, and we have the advantage of what I believe to be one of the prettiest snow-fallen campuses in the country. Snow is nature’s own aphrodisiac. Take a walk holding hands, buy hot chocolate, have a snowball fight, have a stranger take a picture of the two of you in front of old main. Any of it, all of it, is gag-inducing cute. And I know you probably don’t want to be spending your Valentine’s Day freezing in the snow, but think about it. Once you’re done, all either of you will want to do is curl up next to each other trying to warm up.

I know what you’re thinking, and no, I didn’t forget about the singletons on Valentines day. Here’s your to-do list.

1. Get French Fries. Or Nachos. Or really any salty junk food. It’s comforting, but not in the depression-inducing manner that chocolate gets you.

2. Watch an action/comedy. Avoid chick flicks at all costs. Even the movie “Valentine’s Day” is a no. They’re all just going to make you sit there wallowing in self-pity wondering why you weren’t given Rachel McAdams’ bone structure. So go for something with less of an emphasis on the romantic plot-line. For this year, my movie of choice is Guardians of the Galaxy. I haven’t seen it yet, but Zoe Saldana is painted green, and, honestly, who doesn’t want to see quirky Chris Pratt shirtless.

3. Go to CVS. Not on Saturday. Go on Sunday when all of the Valentine’s Day is 75% off. Drown your insecurities and self-pity in chocolate the next day, when at least you have the droning of unsatisfied girlfriends to comfort you. Trust me, you’ll feel better.

So, whether you are starting a relationship, in a relationship, or riding solo, you can still have a half-decent Valentine’s Day (because that’s really as good as it gets). So go out there and have fun! And remember, theres always 75% off chocolate the next day.

Relationship Dictionary

This post is a college student’s guide to the different types of relationships you can have, as told by a girl.

1. Talking: Talking is the sort of preface to dating, however it doesn’t necesarrily have to lead to dating. Talking simply consists of two people, well, talking a lot. It’s the stage where you get to know each other, and often text on a regular basis. It can include hanging out on occasion and tends to elicit the common question “are you two a thing?” Talking is not by nature an exclusive relationship, however it is subject to change at the will of those parties involved. In the beginning stages, either party can hold the same relationship with a number of other individuals, as it is merely a form of getting to know another person.

2. Hooking Up: Hooking up means you hang out with another person for no reason outside of physical desire. Most communication in a hooking up relationship is simply to ask if the second party wants to meet up. This relationship can be complicated by an already existent friendship between the two parties, as it elicits a confusion in regard to which part of the relationship is more dominant. Like talking, hooking up does not necessarily imply monogamy. While it is more common for men to have more than one hook-up, it is not uncommon for either party to hook up with other individuals. However, due to the rather instable emotional state that comes with the territory, hooking up can often lead to other things. More frequently, a girl will seek something more than the hooking up relationship and hope to progress to at least a talking relationship.

3. Dating: This is a very rare relationship to have in college. Dating is basically talking without the technological aspect. It consists of hanging out with another person on a semi-regular basis for the purpose of getting to know them better, and to figure out if you want a relationship with them. As with talking, this is a non-exclusive relationship and either party can date a number of individuals at a time.

4. “In a Relationship”: this is the only truly exclusive relationship in college. This is when you call the other person boyfriend or girlfriend and spend a lot of time together. It is the traditional form of a relationship, where your only romantic interest is for your boyfriend or girlfriend, and any deviation from that relationship is considered cheating.


Now, these are merely the definitions I have gathered from my own personal observation and experience. These definitions can certainly vary from person to person, which is why communication is so important between two people. With any type of relationship you have it is imperative that you define not necessarily your status, but your expecations for yourself and your partner. While it may be uncomfortable, it’s a lot better than being hurt further down the road because you expected more from someone than they believed.



Recently, snapchat has issued an update to its application which allows only the user to see their best friends. And it would be an understatement to say that people are upset about it.

If you are unfamiliar with snapchat, it is an application for your phone which allows you to send pictures to your friends for up to ten seconds before they disappear forever. When viewing your friend list, snapchat used to show a list of the three people that snapchatted each individual user most frequently.

Girls are ridiculed for overemphasizing the implications that this feature creates. Often girls are known to create problems in their relationships because their boyfriend has another girl as his best friend on snapchat. In many girls minds, this is definitive proof that their boyfriend is in fact cheating on them.

Additionally, girls use snapchat as a passive aggressive way of bragging about who they are currently involved with. If a girl starts talking to a new guy, you better believe he is going to be at the top of her snapchat best friends list. With the assumption that people take on which links members of the opposite sex romantically to their best friend on snapchat, it’s a girls way of saying “look who I’m talking to” without actually saying it. Needless to say, girls (And many guys) spoke out when snapchat revoked this feature, and snapchat has issued a statement saying that they will in fact be reinstating the best friend feature on their application.

One of the most talked about features of the snapchat app is the snap story. The snap story allows users to upload a ten second photo or video which is then posted to the feeds of all the user’s friends along with other users’ stories. This photo or video can be seen by all friends for 24 hours after it is posted before the media is deleted. People really like snap stories because they are brief visual updates to your life which is less formal than posting on facebook or instagram. However, the snap story is a double edged sword. While it is fun to post updates about what’s going on today for your friends to see, many people get carried away with it. On a Saturday or Sunday morning, it is not uncommon to open your snapchat app to see stories which are 200 seconds of selfies or videos at a party. And this is something both guys and girls are guilty of. While you do not receive a notification outside of the app when a story is posted, the normally transparent box at the lower right hand corner will turn purple and show the number of story updates posted since you last checked, and new stories will appear at the top of your friends list under “Recent Updates” until they are viewed or the 24 hours expired. And that gets very annoying when you have to scroll through twenty recent updates to see your friend list.

Snapchat’s unique and fleeting nature has allowed it to grow to become one of the biggest apps on both apple and android app stores and doesn’t seem to be dwindling any time soon. So all I have to say for now is stop reading too much into your guy’s best friends on snapchat and, for god’s sake, stop posting 35 selfies with your “ride or die”.

The “C” Word

No, not that one.

People (yes, men and women) have a lovely array of words to describe the mental state of the women in their lives. And here is my (and probably half of women everywhere) think about it.


1. Bipolar.

It is completely normal for someone to change their mind. It cannot be expected that someone will make one decision and not give it a second thought. And yet, when a girl happens to change her mind, she is suddenly bipolar.

2. Crazy.

Crazy is reserved specifically for when a girl does something you don’t like. Get jealous? Crazy. Stalk on social media? Crazy. (as if not everyone cyber-stalks) Basically any time a girl has any sort of unhidden emotion she is crazy. Or any time she acts on them. I must note that girls are the worst offenders. Walk into a dispute between two girls and you’ll hear it thrown around more than “literally”. No one actually believes that someone is crazy when they use it, and still it is used in stride. Yet, despite the lax use of the term, girls find it very offensive. So girls need to develop a thicker skin or use the word crazy less.

3. PMS-ing

My personal favorite. The cover-all for any sort of negative emotion a girl may be experiencing at the moment. Of course it is true that biology can play a factor in how a girl may be feeling. However, it is simply cruel to discredit any feeling that you don’t agree with to Mother Nature. If a girl starts crying when there’s mayo on her sandwich after she specifically ordered no mayo, then yes that is a likely explanation. But if a girl is upset about something, you should hear her out. Maybe there is some merit to how she’s feeling. Additionally, if a girl is “PMS-ing”, do you really want to accuse her of it? All that will do is upset her further, and get you in a lot of trouble. So it’s probably best you refrain from using that one.

It’s about time we stop using derivations of terms for mental illness to offend people. I understand that sometimes people do act a bit off-their-rocker, but if you really need to call them out on it get creative!