Hello beautiful human. <3

I think it’s about time that I talked about gender today, which is what seems like the less commonly understood part of identity. I don’t know whether or not you’ve put much thought into your gender recently if you have been questioning, but I don’t blame you if you’ve figuratively put a pin in it to come back to later. It isn’t always the best time for a gender crisis (*insert image of me having a gender crisis at my desk at midnight while trying to study for my entomology exam in the morning*). Is it possible that I may have put off making a post about gender to somewhat avoid the topic for a bit myself? I’ll give you a “maybe” on that one, and leave it at that.

To start, let’s get some definitions out of the way! I’ll include some below, but please consider checking out this longer list of LGBTQIA+ terms from which the following definitions were taken.

Cisgender: “Cisgender is a term for people whose gender identity fits with the sex they were assigned at birth. Cisgender can therefore be used to describe people who are not transgender.”

Transgender: “Transgender refers to someone whose gender identity does not match the sex they were assigned at birth… A trans person’s identity is not determined by how, or if, they transition.”

Non-binary: “​​A Non-Binary person is someone who does not identify with the binary genders of male and female.”

Genderqueer: “A term used by those who identify outside of the binary genders of male and female. Genderqueer can be used as an umbrella term for people whose gender expression and/or identity rejects the gender binary.”

Gender fluid: “A genderfluid person is someone whose gender is not fixed but can move fluidly along the spectrum from masculinity to femininity. Their gender may fluctuate throughout the day, over weeks or months, or depending on their environment.”

Genderflux: “A genderflux person is someone whose gender varies in intensity over time. Genderflux can be seen as a form of gender fluidity and genderflux people may also identify as transgender, genderqueer, or non-binary.” (includes girlflux and boyflux)

Demigender: “Demigender refers to someone who experiences only a partial connection to a specific gender identity. Many demigender people also consider themselves to be non-binary.”
(includes demigirl and demiboy)

Agender: “A person who identifies as not having a gender identity. Some agender people may identify as non-binary, whereas others may identify as gender lacking, gender neutral, or as not having a gender at all.”

Maybe you’ve heard of all of these labels, but maybe you learned something new. As always, don’t feel like you have to pick a specific label yet (or ever). Feel free to use these to get a better understanding of terms already in existence and see if you align with any of them.

If you think you’re feeling any gender dysphoria (a sense of mismatch between your biological sex and gender identity), you may want to try experimenting with your identity and expression to feel more comfortable with yourself. Try starting off when you’re alone if that makes you feel the most safe and free to present yourself in a way that matches how you truly feel. This is exactly how many people began experimenting more with their identities over quarantine. When you’re ready, try expressing yourself more in public.

As a note, expression and clothes do NOT equal gender. You can present yourself however you wish, in whatever ways make you comfortable and confident with your identity. There is not one way to look if you identify as non-binary for example. The point of identifying outside of the gender binary is not forcing yourself into a box decided by society. You can express yourself in more androgynous, masculine, or feminine ways (or some combination of any of the above) regardless of your gender identity. Do whatever makes you happy and brings you gender euphoria!

Finally, I’d like to say something that I have heard and that I have thought about quite a lot. If you’re putting a lot of thought into questioning your gender, chances are you probably aren’t cis. People who are cisgender generally don’t feel like that. And that’s perfectly wonderful. Just try to understand and accept your authentic self as you are.

Alright, take some time to process all of this information. I hope it helped somewhat, at least in validating some of your feelings. As always, you’re doing great. I’m proud of you.

With love,
PJ <3

 

 

Helpful Sources:

Site 1, Site 2

 

Photo Credits:

Image 1, Image 2, Image 3, Image 4