I will be the first to admit, that cadets love to think that we are tougher than we actually are. It is rare to meet a cadet and have them not bring up ROTC in conversation as we boast about how early we got up that morning.

Yes ROTC is difficult and time consuming, but at the end of the day, we are just cadets who have the privilege to be getting a college education while having all the fun that comes with attending a big state school like Penn State. Thank you if you think we are cool but remember, we do not deserve a fraction of the respect that real veterans do. This is why we cringe in embarrassment when someone visiting campus thanks us for our service- we have not done any service.

But there are a few Cadets, and an entire staff, or cadre as we call it, who have served in past. Their accomplishments in the Army are vast and varied but one thing that they have in common is that they are all badasses. In an effort to thank veterans and raise awareness, I would just like to talk about some of the cadre members and prior enlisted cadets.

Firstly is Captain Santos. You may have seen her story told in a recent article of the Collegian. At 18, she snuck away from her home to go to basic training. Having graduated basic and serving for a while, she was offered the chance to complete an ROTC program. Upon graduating, she commissioned as an aviator and flew Black Hawks during multiple deployments including one in Afghanistan. As part of her officer career plan, she now teaches freshman Army classes here.

Next is Sergeant Van. Nobody knows what exactly Sergeant Van did in the Army because no one is allowed to. The only thing we can know is that he was a Green Beret (special forces operator), proficient in multiple languages and hand to hand combat, who served on multiple deployments. Sergeant Van, in addition to teaching Army classes, coaches our Ranger Team for military skills competitions and imparts all of his special forces wisdom. One thing I will say is that no one can paint camouflage like him.

Next, is someone who is probably everyone’s favorite cadet. That would be no other than Sergeant Moyer. Moyer is prior enlisted and is attending here on a Green to Gold scholarship with the hopes of going back to the infantry as an officer this time. Moyer has served in the 82nd Airborne in addition to the 10th Mountain division. He has been to Afghanistan on multiple combat tours and has sadly left us for the next month to train snipers with the Pennsylvania National Guard. Anyway, one would think that someone with such a resume would be serious and unapproachable. Moyer is no such thing. The man is filled with stories and might be one of the funniest guys in Penn State. In formation he is always armed with the most hilarious observational humor and is always willing to give advice or just stories to anyone who comes to him.

Now yes, this is a short list, but these are just some of the soldiers in the program that I have personally encountered. There are so many other Cadre members and prior enlisted who have had impressive and honorable careers. Just walking through the cadre’s office one will at first glance see guys in camo typing away but when they look closer they will see deployment patches, Ranger tabs, combat infantry badges, and men and women who have done a lot and continue to do a lot for our country.

So in closing, don’t ever, ever, thank a cadet, but please, make sure you thank a veteran.

If you have ever asked a cadet or a midshipmen from any of the branches offered at Penn State what the difference between say Army and Marines, or Navy and Air Force is, the response will most likely be something along they lines of “we are better.”

Yes, we are all on the same team but there is an extreme sense of rivalry between all of us. Each of the armed services has their own “espirit de corps” and culture of excellence which gives each of us an extreme sense of pride and a conviction to constantly remind other branches why ours is better.  I am good friends with midshipmen from the Navy and Marines, as well as Air Force cadets and never can we have a friendly conversation that does not devolve into us arguing why one branch is better than the other.

At the end of they day, we all have love for each other and know we are all integral pieces to the military. With that, I’d like to break down what each branch does and how they work.

The Air Force- The Air Force used to be part of the Army until they split off in the fifties, they also used to fly planes. Now they sit at computers and stay in hotels. Every AirForce barracks is complete with an ice cream machine and a massage chair. In fact, the Penn State Air Force Cadet Lounge has a bed in it! Then again, the bed is necessary. The average airman weighs 90 pounds when they are soaking wet and running once a week like they do really tires them out. The Air Force wears dashing baby blue uniforms which are reminiscent of mall cop uniforms. Every Airman I have met is way too enthusiastic most of the time and has a 5.0 GPA.

The Navy- The NROTC at Penn State is very disciplined in their drill and ceremony and their workouts are apparently really hard. But this makes sense, you know, you have to be really fit to stand on the deck of a ship all day.

The Marines- I have a deep respect for Marines and I was once heavily considering doing Marines instead of Army but then I had a rethink. One thing the Marines have going for them is the coolest uniforms in the entire military, they are sweet. Whenever discussing the difference between the Marines and Army with a Marine midshipman, he will tell you that the Marines are always the first to fight but he will fail to mention that they are dwarfed by the size of the Army and the lack Airborne Units, Delta, and Rangers. Marines on average are usually about 20 pounds heavier in muscle than the average cadet but are usual about 15 IQ points short. The Marines also love crayons.

The Army- The Army is the best branch in the military. You can do anything in the Army from being a veterinarian to lawyer to an airborne Ranger. The Army has the best equipment, the best units, the best soldiers, and is the envy of all the other branches.

That has been my unbiased, and purely factual synopsis of each branch. I hope this has cleared any confusion.

10-14-18
Memorandum For Capt. April M. Santos, Nittany Lion Battalion, State College PA
Subject: Leave of Absence
Security: Classified

Captain Santos,
I have contracted a basically fatal illness and request a leave of absence from physical training for this week.
Thank you,
-Cadet Wright

The above is a never before seen, recently declassified memorandum from the Department of The Army. Who knows what this is from or what else they are hiding from us.

Actually, that is a slightly paraphrased and maybe a little bit dramatized version of the memo that I wrote to my commanding officer on Sunday night. No I do not have a fatal illness but I do have a bad case of the coxsackievirus. Its scarier than it sounds and I am recovering well but you are probably wondering what all this has to do with the title of this article.

On Friday the 12, I spent the entire morning sulking and managed to inch my way over to University Health Services where I received the diagnosis. I promptly went back to bed where I resumed my two day long hibernation when at a about 1600, my roommate woke me up. Under normal circumstances, I would smite, I mean reprimand, him for his transgression but I was not quite up to strength and also wondering what gave this man the gaul to pull me out of my vegetative state. Cadet Kavka then reminds me that we are to report to the South Side of the IM building in 20 minutes to form up for the Homecoming Parade.  I had completely forgotten about the parade and I swear on Baby Jesus that in my diseased and foggy state, yelling and marching through the streets of State College was the epitome of the most definite and absolute last thing I could possibly want to do at that moment.

None the less, my feelings of pride and love for Penn State soon overcame the discomfort of my affliction and gave me a set of wings as I proudly donned my Army Combat Uniform (and drank a bottle of DayQuil coupled with approximately 1800 mg of ibuprofen).

Cadet Kavka and I made it to the field in time and in the Army’s typical hurry up & wait fashion, we had an hour until we needed to actually form up and start marching. Though I literally looked like a leper, the medicine had begun to take affect and talking to my buds made me actually kind of happy to be there.

The hour went by quickly and soon we were formed up and ready to go. While our Navy ROTC brothers marched behind us, stoically shouldering their rifles in silence as they marched in step, we sang cadences the entire time. For those who don’t know what a cadence is, the classic “I don’t know what I’ve been told…” is an example of a cadence. You have most definitely seen it done in any Army movie before.

The MSIIIs or juniors were charged with being the cadence callers. The thing about a cadence is, they keep the formation in step, that is, they ensure that everyone’s feet are hitting the ground at the same time. The only thing the caller has to do, is keep the rhythm of their song. This is a ridiculously simple task that is still somehow screwed up by the high drag juniors but maybe I am being too hard on them. It is probably much harder to call cadence when you are before the formation but who knows. All I know is that when Im a junior, my formation will be marching to Buttercup Baby or Mo Bamba. 

Marching in uniform as part of the parade was actually a proud moment. The kids loved us and old timers were thanking us for our service which is kind of them but always a little awkward since we are hardly soldiers yet. Regardless, I was happy to do it and I wish my mom was there to see it.

It was the year 1966. It was homecoming week and campus was buzzing while everyone was anxiously getting ready to embarrass Syracuse that weekend. Sue Paterno, in a light-hearted effort of good will to rally excitement for the game, secretly splashed the lion shrine with water based orange paint. This was all in good fun to stir the student body however a group of students from Syracuse would be less forgiving in their tarnishing of the lion. Later that week, on the evening November 2nd, 1966, a dispatch of six Syracuse students descended onto campus. On arriving to the Lion Shrine, they found it deserted with no sentinel on post. Unopposed, and equipped with a fire extinguisher filled with an oil based, permanent, orange paint, they vandalized the lion in a most sacrilegious gesture. The group of rambunctious scum bags were compromised when they were spotted trying to paint Beaver Stadium’s goal posts orange by campus police.

Any student or alumni of Penn State University knows that we have more than just school pride. We are borderline cultish in our exhibitions of school spirit. If Penn State was a cult, then the lion shrine would be our idol. Because of how passionate we are, any enemy of Penn State knows that a strike against the lion is the most outrageous thing they can do. Such an act challenges our ability to protect our most precious piece of culture and is a direct attack on our pride.

The events of 1966 angered us. Penn State vowed that we would not be made to feel so vulnerable again. In response to the outrage, Lion’s Gaurd was born.

Lion’s Guard is first and foremost, Penn State ROTC’s color guard and drill team. We present the flag for football games and most Penn State events, especially those that are military related like the POW vigil that was held two weeks ago. Every Tuesday we meet to work on flag detail, marching, and rifle movements. These things are pretty standard for any school’s color guard but what sets us apart from the others is our homecoming week tradition.

As you could probably guess, our names sake is from what we do during homecoming. Throughout the entire week leading up to the game, Lion’s Guard Staff take thirty minute shifts to keep the lion under constant vigilance and deter any would be vandals. We have been authorized to use all necessary force to deter any Michigan State students this week.

That last part was not true of course and the reality is, guarding the lion is more of a tradition now than anything. Guarding the lion yesterday night really reminded me what makes Penn State different from other colleges. No other school has the resounding pride and spirit that we do.

I have, by now, done three guard duties. For each of the shifts, I had to maintain my military bearing (no smiling) while remaining at the position of parade rest with rifle in hand. It is not a difficult task but one filled with tedium. To get through it you just need to find things to look at and remember to not lock your knees.