November 21, 2020 By Ayana Francois On Monday Fashion experts at the CDC discovered a new strain of turtleneck that is rapidly spreading across the northeast. Scientists believe this is a new style of the…
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By Ava Wendelken PHILADELPHIA, Pa. – Ah, fuck, man. We actually did a really bang-up job with the whole cancer thing, but when we went outside to show people walking by, a really big gust…
By Joshua Weis SAVANNAH, Ga. – After centuries of debate, a group project at the Savannah State University led to the discovery of how to scientifically summon a genuine ghost. After several minutes of communicating…
By Ben Hommrich SANTA FE, Nm. – Scientists from the Sierra Mist™ Marine Biology Refreshment Institute have published a shocking study showing that six-pack rings are the necklace of choice for endangered sea turtles. Previously,…
By Tom Vine DALLAS – The infamous grassy knoll from President John F. Kennedy’s assassination was found with its leaves cut in Dallas, Texas, this morning. The bush was 92. The official cause of death…
