The photo essay published by Katie Reilly for TIME exposes the realities of college life during the pandemic. I believe it is reflective of my college experience. Reilly’s photos capture multiple students in masks, and, quite symbolically, they are mostly photographed alone. Each caption exhibits the frustration and anxiety we all collectively feel as young adults and college students. Uncertainty about finding jobs, the lack of an in-classroom connection, and sadness at what we lost all characterize our experience of the pandemic tainted 2020-2021 academic year.
The photo that stood out to me most was of Kaleigh Quinnan, a senior, in her bedroom staring blankly at a wall. This photo is the only photo of a student without a mask, and you can fully see the look of exhaustion on her face. I know that stare. The give-my-eyes-a-break-from-the-screen and look-up-to-remember-I-still-exist look. I often practice this stare throughout my day, reminding myself that life continues outside of Zoom and Canvas. “It’s a lot of anxiety” the caption reads. Quinnan stayed an additional semester to “let the dust settle” after the economic fallout caused by the pandemic wrecked the job market. While I am devastated by the freshman year I feel I lost, I cannot compare my feelings to the uncertainty of entering the work force when jobs are few and far between. In that regard, I am grateful I am only a first year student, even though I wasn’t allotted the “freshman experience.”
Another photo captures a mannequin with a nittany lion-printed face mask. Now desensitized to anything pandemic related, I can only laugh at how much distress that photo would’ve caused me just a few years back, perhaps during my college visit. I remember standing in the Hub bookstore as I purchased my first Penn State hoodie during my spring visit in 2019. I was thrilled to begin my senior year of high school so I could graduate and attend university the following fall. I was so excited to experience a Penn State football game, dress up for a tailgate, or cheer for our nationally ranked team at a hockey game. Two years later and the only time I’ve entered the Pegula Ice Arena was for random Covid testing.
While the photo essay captured the despair and uncertainty of the fall semester, the hope of vaccines has changed our outlook a bit. I believe students have more optimism about the future. The Blue and White game this weekend will have fans – freshmen – in attendance. Classes in the fall have been promised to take place in person, hopefully giving our strained eyes a break. The rate of infection has plateaued nationally and the CDC isn’t predicting a terrifying new surge in cases. It feels as though now we are awaking from a bad dream… but one that you remain haunted by for the remainder of the day.
I hope I get the “true college experience” at least one year of my career at Penn State. Until then, I’ll diligently wear my Penn State gifted, blue cloth mask as I write my blogs from the 2nd floor of the Hub. Watching the slow trickle of students flow in and out as I wonder what the center of campus looks like during a “normal” year.
