I think that in a lot of cases, being “appropriate” is common sense. Adults instinctively know not to shout in a theatre as a show is being performed. They know not to shove a slow walker out of the way. They realize that making sexual jokes during a business meeting is not something that they should do. However, just because someone instinctively knows something is inappropriate, that doesn’t mean that they aren’t going to do it. Sometimes emotions get out of hand, or something unfiltered just slips out, or the person just goes against instinct to prove they don’t care if they are “appropriate” or not. In these cases, I believe that embarrassment and fear of being disliked stops people from pursuing inappropriate behavior. Sometimes, though, appropriateness is determined and regulated by the government. There are laws against inappropriate behavior like laws that send people to jail if they behave inappropriately by stealing something or murdering someone they don’t like.

Sometimes the line between appropriate and inappropriate is very blurry and depends on how people are raised. For some heterosexual couples, the woman thinks it is “appropriate” for the man to pay for the meal because this behavior has been promoted by society and her parents for her whole life. I, however, refuse to let my boyfriend pay for my meal because I was raised to be an independent woman who can pay for her own stuff. Because of these differences in how people are raised, it is always important to ask someone about behaviors that might be different than yours instead of just calling these behaviors “inappropriate.” Appropriateness also changes with time. Fifty years ago, society deemed spanking an appropriate punishment for misbehaved children, but now it is frowned upon by most.

I think that a person should be able to challenge society’s definition of “appropriate” behaviors as long as the behavior isn’t hurting anyone. For example, if a man inappropriately touches a woman on her breast, he should face consequences because he is causing that woman extreme discomfort and distress with his inappropriate behavior. On the other hand, if a child puts his elbows on the table at dinner time, this action is not causing anyone harm and could be debated as appropriate or inappropriate behavior.