I recently finished my full rewatch of the Clone Wars series, and one of the aspects of the show that I was paying a great deal of attention to, out of sheer interest in Anakin as a character, was how the Clone Wars handled his descent to the Dark Side in a way that was undoubtedly more satisfying for most fans than the movies.

One thing I loved about how Anakin’s dark side in the Clone Wars was the relative subtlety. Anakin is so ridiculously extreme in the prequels, with his psychopathic outbursts (see the video of him in the post about movie Padmé) and general flagrantly evil tendencies. In the Clone Wars, while he is still very much quick to anger, he tends to somewhat more methodical than emotional with his morally questionable actions, which personally I find both more true-to-life of a flaw for a character who would eventually become a ruthless dictator.

In the Clone Wars, Anakin’s primary conflict with the Jedi Order does not have to do with the fact that he feels personally disrespected by their unwillingness to feed into his ambition, but by the fact that he thinks their hyper-morality and excessive rules are a detriment to their ability to fight the Clone Wars successfully, an idea outlined explicitly through his early interactions with Tarkin.

When he does something evil in the Clone Wars, it is typically a means to an end rather than purely the result of unchecked anger. Personally, I find a somewhat logical villain a lot more compelling than a whiny baby villain who lashes out and kills people for no real reason. I do sort of wish they had made Anakin a BIT more emotionally vulnerable in the Clone Wars however. It can be somewhat easy to forget that he is an emotionally damaged 19-20 year old when he is too cool and competent.

The Clone Wars does generally maintain his dispositional problems by racking them up to impulsivity and a desire to play by his own rules. By focusing on Anakin’s lack of self control and “difficulty working with others” the Clone Wars makes him an extremely effective foil to Obi Wan, who is so dang good at following Jedi values (in spite of their contradictions) that he practically embodies them.

Making Anakin complex and likeable in the first place is essential to getting us invested in his downfall, and through good writing of his character, the Clone Wars accomplishes this exceptionally well. All the while, the Clone Wars also does a great job at reminding us that he will eventually become Darth Vader, through moments scattered throughout the series and compiled in this neat video that I may or may not have watched several times already.

 

I said I would talk more about women in the prequels era, and on this snow day when I want nothing more than to get these blog posts over with, I figured the woman that it would be easiest to talk about for 400 words would probably be Ahsoka Tano.

Part of what makes Ahsoka such an awesome character is how she defies expectations and how she develops in a realistic way. As this article, Why Ahsoka Tano is the Best Thing to Happen to Star Wars in 20 Years,  Lauren Davis writes that Ahsoka’s character was originally not well-received, saying that “When Ahsoka was first introduced, a lot of critics had two things to say about her: first, that she was obnoxious, and second, that she was going to die.”

Ahsoka is literally a child soldier, so the idea that people were annoyed by her childishness at the beginning is weird but understandable. As is expected in a show as good with character development as The Clone Wars, Ahsoka matures realistically over the course of the series, and quite honestly turns out to be simultaneously one of the most badass and most complex, well-rounded characters of the entire franchise. The fact that she is not in any of the movies is an apparent hurdle that the series overcomes in an extremely interesting way, which I will not spoil, but will say that it makes for one of the strongest arcs of the series.

To me what makes Ahsoka so compelling are her strong morals, which exist independent of her allegiance to the Jedi order. In a universe so black and white and so based on the inherent goodness or inherent evil of certain groups, it is really neat to see a character who is wholly motivated by her own strong sense of morality. Unlike Obi-Wan and most other Jedi, for whom the Order comes before everything, Ahsoka will do the right thing regardless of what she is told, especially in lieu of what eventually ends up happening to her master, Anakin.

Overall, Ahsoka is a very complex and strong female character who adds a whole lot of depth and nuance to the series. As much as I dislike the new trend of making Star Wars solo movies (no pun intended), I would totally be down to see an Ahsoka film. She deserves it. I, along with many other Star Wars fans, are also extremely excited for her return in the Clone Wars revival, which is revealed dramatically at the end of this trailer.

This post is under the cut because of spoilers.

Read More

So last night I watched a SPECTACULAR episode of The Clone Wars. And I mean REALLY SPECTACULAR, like, I haven’t gotten this excited over a piece of media in months spectacular.  I’ve kind of been thinking about it all morning because it was just so darn good. It’s Season 5 Episode 16: The Lawless.

(THAT ANIMATION THOUGH. THIS BLURRY GIF DOESN’T REALLY DO IT JUSTICE BUT OH MAN, IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL)

I wasn’t surprised at all to find out that this is actually the highest rated episode of the entire Clone Wars series on IMDB. Everything about this episode: the pacing, the score, the drama, the emotional impact is just

 

 

There are SPOILERS AHEAD, so if you care about that kind of thing, and if you are considering watching the Clone Wars, (or the Phantom Menace) I would strongly advise you not to read any further, because I’m about to talk about plot stuff here.

Read More

Among critics and fans, Episode I is pretty much universally considered to be the worst Star Wars movie of all time. If I even attempted to give a brief overview of all of the reasons for this, this post would be way over the word requirement, so right now I just want to talk about a particular poorly-received concept that this film introduced: midichlorians.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FoVpSPXGCvc

I actually have a friend who is weirdly obsessed with Liam Neeson’s character in the Phantom Menace and is thus is a whole lot more sympathetic to this movie than the average person, and a while ago he raised me an interesting question: “Why don’t people like the idea of midichlorians?” I realized that I hadn’t actually ever taken the time to consciously think about why I think midichlorians are stupid. For me it was just one of those things that you just intuitively understand is a bad idea.

To answer his question I just muttered something about how it demystifies the force and undermines the hero’s journey “every-man” aspect of Star Wars by taking away the idea that everyone can be a Jedi. Upon further consideration, however, I realized that this is not a sufficient explanation. For one thing, the idea that only some people have the ability to use the force is not a new concept of Star Wars. When Yoda tells Luke in Return of the Jedi,

it implies that there is SOMEWHAT of a biological basis for force sensitivity, in the same way that in Harry Potter, some people are born wizards while others are born muggles. However, in Harry Potter this is not explained as determined through some simplistic microorganism that lives in people’s blood. In fact, the mention that IS made of blood is the pure-blood mud-blood distinction, which is very obviously an allegory for eugenicist white nationalist belief that certain important traits are based on fundamental biological differences between races. It is clearly not rooted in any actual science because frankly,

And I know of course it’s dumb to expect science within a science fiction series to make sense, but if the whole purpose you are introducing a scientific concept is to put some logic into something mystical, I feel like it should be maybe, I don’t know, logical? The whole concept of an entire ability set being determined simply by the presence of a microorganism is just, going back to my original point, stupid, in my opinion.

So basically the problem with midichlorians from my point of view is not necessarily that it is deterministic or that it demystifies the force, but that it does so in the weirdest and least interesting way possible. They  contribute absolutely nothing meaningful to Star Wars canon, and the fact that they are never brought up again within the series is a pretty telling reflection of that fact.

However, my opinion on this isn’t the only one that exists. There are plenty of people who find midichlorians to be a fascinating piece of worldbuilding. What do you think? Were midichlorians an interesting idea, did they ruin the force, or are they somewhere in between?

The Clone Wars is not just the name of a show, but the name of a three-year conflict fought between the Separatist and the Republic. It is a conflict that was first mentioned by Obi-Wan in A New Hope, as seen in this completely unedited footage from the very first Star Wars film. (Okay, the first part is unedited. I couldn’t find an unedited clip but honestly I think this might be even better).

While only mentioned as a throwaway line in the original trilogy, this war is heavily expanded upon in the prequels films and the TV show. I may or may not have mentioned this in my first post, but something I talk about a lot when I talk about why I like the prequels era is that for a franchise with “Wars” in the name, a lot of the conflicts that take place in the original trilogy, and especially the new movies, do not have the size, scope, or political and ethical complexity of real historical wars.

I’m laughing at myself as I type this when I say political and ethical complexity because the prequels era is infamously overrun with childish aspects which in some instances, absolutely cause these analyses to fall short. At the same time, however these interesting nuances do exist in other places across these series. A good example of this dichotomy is that on the Republic side, the primary soldiers who actually do the fighting are clones, hence the name: The Clone Wars. The mere concept of a clone army is honestly so much more ethically messed up and thought-provoking than what the evil Separatist side uses, which are comic relief battle droids.

 

 

 

 

 

 

A central Separatist ideological justification for the war is that the Republic is corrupt, a point which is actually shown to be accurate in many cases. Throughout the war, the main figurehead at the head of the Republic is this guy, Supreme Chancellor “Meme-fodder” Sheev “Definitely Not Evil” Palpatine, who shockingly ends up having been a sith lord the whole time.

There’s a lot of silliness here, sure, but The Clone Wars TV series actually does a fantastic job at portraying the politics of the war in a way that actually does feel realistic and true-to-life. The battles, the conferences, the stakes, the effects on civilians, and sheer brutality of the war are portrayed in a very unique way in the prequels era. I will definitely expand on the ethical implications of clones and the way that the Clone Wars TV series portrays the brutality of war in future posts.

If you were to ask a Prequels fan to think about some of the time period’s most powerful and formidable figures, they would instantly think of Jedi like Anakin, Obi-Wan, and Ahsoka, as well as Sith-aligned individuals such as Lord Sidious, General Grievous, Darth Maul, Count Dooku, Savage Opress (Yeah there is a Star Wars villain whose name is literally “Savage Opress.” We might talk about him later), and General Grievous. However, a really fun fact that only Clone Wars fans know is that every single one of these people, with the excpetion of Sidious, has at one point been captured and/or defeated by THIS GUY:

This Slashflim article does a really good job at explaining who Hondo is and why he’s awesome, and in this post I will be talking about some of the reasons I personally think Hondo is one of the best Star Wars character of all time.  On the off-chance that you did check out that article, you saw that Hondo is voiced by Jim Cummings who is best known as the voice of Winne the Pooh and Tigger. (Quick side note on that point; A lot of prequels fans have made jokes about Ewan McGregor, who plays Obi-Wan in the prequels, being cast as adult Christopher Robin in that Disney movie that came out this August, like the one pictured below, but this tweet from Jim Cummings is also absolutely hilarious to me.)

Anyway, there are two major reasons why Hondo’s voice actor is significant. The first is that Cummings does an INCREDIBLE JOB at voice acting him. SO much of the appeal of Hondo comes from his fantastic performance. Here’s a cool fraction of a scene that shows why I can’t help but smile every time Hondo is on screen and how much of his character derives from the way Jim Cummings delivers his lines.

The other reason it’s significant- and you may have gleaned this from the video- is that Hondo Ohnaka is a straight savage. He murders and tortures people all the time (because Clone Wars is a kid’s show). In one episode I watched a few days ago he straight up ordered his men to kill children if they got in the way of his profit. As you hopefully read in the article, though, he really can’t be classified as an all-round bad guy, and that’s part of what makes Hondo so refreshing in a galaxy full of so much black and white morality.

He’s also just hilarious. Here are two clips of my favorite Hondo quotes

“Insolence?! We are pirates. We don’t even know what that means”

“THIS EFFORT! IS NO LONGER! PROFITABLE!”

 

Despite the fact that as of right now, literally no one reading this has seen the prequels and has any context for what I’m talking about, I honestly feel  embarrassed for the intellectual dishonesty in one particular section of the first post of this blog.  I implied feeling alienated by sexist elements original trilogy, which to be fair, are accurately described by the late great Carrie Fisher as “basically boy’s fantasies,“ while neglecting to mention some of the very prominent misogyny of the prequel movies, elements of which unfortunately do permeate into  (though arguably to a lesser extent) the Clone Wars series.

So let’s talk about Padmé. The only major female character in the prequel movie trilogy,  Padmé is primarily characterized as a senator, an unlikely choice of love interest for Anakin Skywalker, and a fashion icon.

There are entire essays dedicated to critiquing problems with the way Padmé is written from a feminist perspective, but instead of expecting you to read those, I’ll just air a few of my personal, but for the most part widely-shared, grievances about her character as well as embed a short video at the end of this segment from my favorite Star Wars-adjacent Youtuber of all time, Jenny Nicholson.

Padmé is so cool in theory. She’s a senator, she wears the dopest outfits, she’s Luke and Leia Skywalker’s mom, and she deserved so, so, so much better from George Lucas. The major problem with how she’s written is that her entire character basically revolves around her romantic relationship with Anakin, and its a relationship that doesn’t even make sense, considering that she’s like Space Bernie Sanders and he’s like proto-Space Hitler.

He’s also really whiny and childish, and I mean literally childish because he’s five years younger than Padmé, which doesn’t seem like a big deal, but the romance starts when Anakin is nine and Padmé is fifteen and, I mean, tell me you can look at this in a romantic context and not feel a little skeeved.

From the moment its first introduced, this romance is already the worst most uncomfortable thing ever, and it only gets worse from there.

Yes, “You’re exactly the way I remember you in my dreams” is a real thing Anakin says to Padmé. It almost puts the “I don’t like sand” monologue to shame. This would all be fine if Padmé reacted like a normal human being, let alone a normal Galactic Senator to Anakin’s shenanigans, but look at how she responds to him in this scene where he literally confesses to her that he killed an slaughtered an entire village and killed a bunch of children. Please ignore the annoying Channel intro; This was the only video I could find with Padmé’s full reaction. Also, the context is that his mom, another  female character who deserved better, got killed by some dudes from that village.

“To be angry is to be human.” GIRL, WHAT THE HELL? HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO VIEW YOU AS A STRONG FEMALE CHARACTER WHEN ALL YOU EVER DO IS ENABLE YOUR INSANE SERIAL KILLER BOYFRIEND? WHY DOES GEORGE LUCAS THINK THIS IS HOW A NORMAL HUMAN WOMAN WOULD REACT TO SOMETHING LIKE THIS?

Man, I’m just really frustrated by Padmé. This isn’t even the worst thing George Lucas did to her though. Shortly after Anakin SHOCKINGLY turns out to be evil, Padmé  gives birth and dies, not of physical complications or anything, but because, out of sadness for Anakin, she “loses the will to live.” If you needed any more evidence that her entire character revolves around Anakin, there you have it. The moment their relationship ends, she dies for no reason. The concept of Padmé dying of sadness is funny for a lot of reasons, but its also THE biggest insult to her character and undermines any defense of the way she is written.

I’m coming to the realization that I set out to write a comprehensive analysis of how women in general are represented in the prequels universe. I was gonna talk about Ahsoka Tano, Asajj Ventress, Clone Wars Padmé, as well as other female prequels icons, but instead I accidentally vented for 779 words about movie Padmé and made a post that was nearly exactly twice as long as it was supposed to be. I will definitely address the other women of the prequels in future posts, but right now, I need to be stopped. I’m signing off with that Jenny Nicholson video I was talking about that both rehashes my points about Padmé and features other valid criticisms of her character. I need to go to sleep. Here you go, good night.

 

 

I was going to wait until at least a few posts in to discuss this topic but I’ve had a lot of tests this week and I’m too burned out to talk about anything else, so here we go.

If you ask the average Star Wars fan what they think about the prequels, there is a pretty good chance they will say something along the lines of,  “I hate them, but the memes though.” Many consider the memes to be the best thing to come out of this infamous trilogy, and to an extent, I’m inclined to agree.

Prequels memes are a big deal. The Reddit page r/Prequel Memes has 710k subscribers, which, as this article points out, is bigger than the Reddit page for Christianity (which I gotta mention is a TERRIBLE litmus test for popularity on Reddit, but hey, it’s something) and the one Star Trek. Since the article was written, it has grown to six times as big as either of those pages, and last year, the biggest post on Reddit was a prequel meme. 

The prequels would not be nearly as relevant as they are now were it not for memes, but how did this meme culture come to be? I’m not so much interested in the history of prequel memes as I am in what makes them so funny. Personally, I think this is a result of what happens when you create a story which is at its core, highly relatable, but execute it in a way that is laughably bad and well, meme-worthy. My desktop background has been a montage of Anakin crying about sand for almost three years now.

Sandakin by Esamitch on Tumblr

It’s obviously a joke, but I’d also be lying if I said this wasn’t my daily mood. Prequel memes are funny because they are inherently stupid-sounding because of the bad dialogue and we can apply them to such a wide variety of contexts. This is partially because we have so many dumb phrases to choose from, that there is a prequel meme for practically every situation. Star Wars dialogue in general is iconic because of its propensity for vague truisms that can be applied to just about everything like, “Never tell me the odds,” and “Do or do not. There is no try.” Prequels dialogue still has that same catchiness and generalizability, but it also sucks, and that’s why we make so many memes about it. Many memes simply poke fun at some of the worst lines in the series:

 

However, many others utilize the generalizability of some of these scenes by applying them to life

 

 

 

I REALLY have not even scratched the surface of this phenomenon and I will definitely be mentioning it in future posts because honestly it is really integral to why I enjoy this stuff so much. In any case, it is clear that there are a lot of reasons for the success of prequels memes. They’re pretty great. I like them. They’re a huge influence on Star Wars culture and culture in general (seriously). If you get into the prequels for no other reason, get into them for the memes.

Exposition

If you’re like most people on the planet, you are, at some level, cognizant of the Star Wars franchise, whether you want to be or not. I think about Star Wars on a daily basis. My roommate has never seen a Star Wars movie in her life, but that doesn’t mean she isn’t forced to look at these fantastically dumb stickers on my wall, or hear about my weekly meetings with the Star Wars club.

Even if you aren’t incredibly into Star Wars, the odds are that you probably know someone who is. If you are into Star Wars, you are likely already judging me for defending the monstrosity that is the prequels. However, that is not what this post is setting out to do. I am not going to attempt to excuse my terrible taste, I just want to explain it.

For those of you who may not know, the prequels refer to Episode I, Episode II, and Episode III of the Star Wars series. They occur chronologically before the original trilogy, but were actually released 16 years after Episode VI. If you’re still confused, here’s a short video that explains the order in greater detail.

Explanation

A lot of people my age who like the prequels have the common excuse, “I grew up with them,” but that doesn’t exactly apply to me. Like many Star Wars fans who are not dudes, as a child I had felt somewhat alienated by the nearly all-male cast and heavily male fan base. As such, I never really felt compelled to get into the movies, and I had never happened upon any of them on TV or anything. (My first actual Star Wars movie was The Force Awakens). What I did encounter on TV, however, because I was addicted to Cartoon Network, was The Clone Wars (2008).  The Clone Wars is a critically acclaimed and widely loved animated series set in- you guessed it- the prequel era. So, although I don’t have nostalgic attachment to the prequel movies themselves, I do feel strongly connected to their characters, overarching story, and the in-universe time period that they are set in.

Nostalgia might be a good explanation for why I own these Obi Wan and Grievous Tsum-tsums (pictured above), and it might even explain why I decided to bring them to college, but it does not explain why this specific universe has a CONSTANT presence in my consciousness. It does not explain the hilarious amount of prequels stickers on my wall. It definitely doesn’t explain why watching the Clone Wars while I work out motivates me to run faster and for a longer period of time.

Some may rationalize their Star Wars obsession, or any fictional obsession, as a form of escapism. While this may ring true for some, it does not resonate with me. On the contrary, I love Star Wars, the prequel-era in particular, because of how it resembles, reflects, and even impacts the real world. If you strip away the horrible dialogue and overall bad execution of the prequel movies, they actually introduced fascinating concepts and an amazing story to the Star Wars universe, and to pop culture in general. When we meme about the prequels, it may be ironic, but if nothing else, it is a testament their originality and their influence on the way we view life.

Also, I love flawed movies. With that, I am going to leave you with a juxtaposition of what are, in my opinion, the best and worst scenes of the prequel trilogy, in consecutive order.