What next

This blog started out as a dialogue, albeit a light-hearted one. I made some valiant efforts to edify the name of the viola as an instrument, the violist as a person, and music as a way of life. I didn’t lie about any of it: the viola is my absolute favorite, underrated instrument; violists are no worse people than any of the other players in the orchestra; and I truly believe music has a place, no matter how small or in what form, in the lives of every person, regardless of anyone’s God-given talent, or a pronounced lack thereof.

That’s all very proud and gallant and all, but is it the most realistic (and did I just say that out loud)? As in, what kind of a career is really out there for a violist? Do you accept your fate as a high school orchestra director? Or an elementary school strings teacher, being spread too thin across the entire district?

No, that’s a little bleak. I think I could aim for at least professorship. Better yet, lets try to land an orchestra gig. Oh wait, what about benefits? Cost of living? Oh dear, we’ll need at least two or three or four of those jobs if we don’t want to be teaching a full studio on the side. Can’t forget about travel expense either, going between those orchestras. Heaven knows it’s not economically sustainable to have more than one professional orchestra within 100 miles of another of equal quality or even comparable caliber.

Maybe that’s not enough competition for me. Maybe I feel too confined by having to play what somebody else wants to hear or tells me to play, or by travel, or rigid scheduling. I need to have freedom. Why can’t I play with just a few of my close, exceptionally talented friends and form a chamber group? That’d be the dream I think. Sure that’s still a lot of travel, but it’s on my time. I mean, our time. We’d be spending a lot of time together – pretty much all day everyday or something crazy like that.

Hm, no. Even that could hold me back. I want to travel the world with my instrument. Just me, on the stage, playing my heart out with the support of a full orchestra. Or maybe I want that one day, and local coffee shop busking the next day. Invitationals, band gigs, teaching every now and then, yeah, just me. Sounds a little lonely, I guess, doesn’t it?

So what we’re quickly realizing is there is no quick answer to this. There are a lot of options, true, but no one said many of them were fool proof. Some are easier to rule out than others, based on practicality and general interest, but a better part of myself says I need to be open to these kinds of things regardless of mental or physical preparedness. I should be ready for anything life has to throw my way, open-mindedness is critical in this day and age, regardless of musical or non-musical contexts. But that’s a discussion for another time.

Point being, it’s damn hard to make it work as a violist. Competition is stiff, mobility is nigh unto nonexistent, and pay is p*** poor. It’s frightening to get asked the question of what do you want to do with your life/degree/thing that you like doing but probably can’t in the way you want to. It’s been depressing at times, and probably has a lot more to do with the dark tone of recent posts that I’d like to admit. It’s a dog eat dog world, and talent is everything in the classical, live-music industry. Lots of people do their own thing and make it work.

Why don’t I feel like I can…