Rather than love, compatibility or preparation, I believe dedication is an important aspect of marriage and can lead to a healthier marriage as well as better mental health. On the other hand, it is argued that the health and happiness statistics regarding marriage are often misleading and do not account for important variables. In a study done with 1,300 people, marital quality was examined as well as other prior factors within the marriage. Specific factors that lead to people believing they have a healthier marriage is having a higher educational quality as well as living with their parents at the age of 14. Factors such as income were not correlated with marriage quality. While many of these factors appear to be exclusive, the study was done at the beginning of the marriage and altering circumstances exist in a population of solely 1,300 people. In addition, almost 10% of the study reported knowing that their spouse had cheated on them, once again leading to lower marital quality. One factor I found surprising was that those that lived with their spouse before marriage reported a lower marital quality. On the other hand, if they had committed to marriage before moving in, they reported higher marital quality (Gantt). Oftentimes, dedication is a result of a higher marital quality; if a couple is more willing to get married the are oftentimes more committed to their relationship. In addition, those that reported having a wedding showed a higher marital quality later in life.
In addition, shocking research has shown that the more people who attend your wedding leads to higher marital quality. Due to the marriage being more public, people are more likely to follow through and stay committed as well as provide a greater social network for support. I believe commitment in a relationship is extremely important but does not necessarily have to be shown through marriage. In addition, many of the “happiness” statistics have shown to be misleading. For example, much of the research compares unmarried and married individuals and doesn’t take into account whether it is a cohabiting partnership. While marriage is a large commitment, it has been reflected that unions with children are just as important to indicate the stability in a relationship (Gantt).
Regarding prior relationships, people who entered a first marriage reported a higher marital quality than those who reported a second or third. Similarly, couples with children from prior relationships had lower marital quality later on. In addition, almost 40 percent have lived with a prior partner before which led to lower marital quality later in life. In regards to marriages, more experience often leads to issues within later relationships. Oftentimes, more experiences with breaking up as well as having children before marriage, leading to a higher divorce rate (Gantt). As a result, these findings have shown that these experiences have resulted in fragile relationships that are detrimental.
Gantt, Edwin E. Taking Sides: Clashing Views on Psychological Issues. McGraw-Hill Education Create, 2018.
This was kind of terrifying. My boyfriend is totally opposed to large weddings so if I wanna keep this going, we better invite like the entire campus haha. On a more serious note, I was kind of surprised that money wasn’t a factor; I feel like a lack of money would cause a lot of problems in a marriage, as it is need for sustenance.
I never examined marriage in the context of an inter-marital social status–i.e., regarding the finding that number of wedding guests is directly proportional to marriage longevity. After all, divorce and separation can be publicly humiliating, and in the age of social media, everyone is quick to convey their own purported “happiness” in lieu of their personal situations. Moreover, I was intrigued by the correlation between divorce and premarital childbirth; in my view, it conveys the necessity of a strong family unit and a sense of morality to remain together–and happy as a result.
Its so interesting how we have automatically assumed that things like money would pay a huge role in quality of marriage. I was surprised to read that larger marriages tend to have higher qualities! I guess its a good thing that Nigerian weddings have like a thousand people attending then lol.
I have been so opposed to the idea of marriage lately…. I realized that rather than it just being about love, its a government agreement. Like, I understand it’s nice to allocate your funds to the person you love but the prenup and things like that… I don’t know. I’ve seen as time goes on people are more in marriage for materialistic things rather than just solely the purpose of love. Of course my relationship doesn’t have to be lie that but it’s definitely something I think about often. Being cheated on is also something I wouldn’t want to deal with, at that point I’d have to pay for lawyers and really just do the most to get out a relationship in which I wasn’t happy or treated properly.
These are interesting. I think it is hard to tell what little things actually make a successful marriage, but at the end of the day it is up to dedication and hard work. I found research a while back saying the smaller the wedding the more likely you are to stay together.