Sleepover Surprise Party
By: Penn State Star Wars Club (Fall 2019)
Characters: Jar Jar Binks, Lando Calrissian, Yoda, Poe Dameron, Watto, Padme Amidala, Ki-Adi-Mundi, Zam Wesell, General Hux
Plot: Padme’s dead but no one knows why
Setting: Padme’s Mansion on the Lagoon – star wars version of clue
Poe – *towards Zam* Traitor!!
Zam – what the fork is this
Jar Jar – sheesa sleepy but sheesa no wakey
Lando – can’t you jedi use your fancy space magic to find out who did it?
*TV screen shows news on the droid attack on the wookies*
Ki – I gotta go yeet
Yoda – how the force works that is not
Watto – this is anakin’s fault
*In walks General Hux*
Poe – hey buddy
Hux – I’ve been called in wha’ts up
Poe – One of these people is a Traitor
Jar Jar – how wude
Poe – *annoyed* Get him out of here
*jar jar oolololol*
*jar jar finds gun* (zams gun but no one knows)
Jar Jar – ooh maybe theesa clue
*gun mysteriously fires*
*lights flicker, jar jar is found dead*
Yoda – Dead the fool is, investigate we must
Lando – hey isn’t this Zam’s gun?
Zam – I don’t have any weapons on me, why do you always insist it’s me? This is outrageous, this is unfair.
*Poe decides to become judge dredd*
Lando – hey gimme that gun, stop trying to kill Zam *wrestling Poe for gun*
Poe – she’s a bounty hunter, they’re all the same
*bumps into holovid*
Padme – “Anakin why can’t you come to my sleepover? You’re breaking my heart” *dies*
Watto – But if this is how Padme died, then who killed Jar Jar?
Yoda – never know we will *turns to camera evil smile, wink*
Poe – I saw that (saw smile wink)
Yoda – thats my cue yeet *lego yoda death sound*
Hux – what the fork
Big end
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Meanwhile on kashyyyk
New Characters: Chewbacca, Itchy, Lumpy, Tarfful, Malla, Terminator 3PO (TPO)
*standing in front on their door with lightsaber in hand*
Ki-Adi-Mundi – Dont worry not a single droid will break through
Chewie – awoowowwoowo uwu
*in the sky on a floating chair is TPO*
TPO – BRING ME THEIR FLESHHH AND THEIR PELTSSS. YESSS
Droids – roger-roger
*Ki-Adi-Mundi cuttin down droids, Lumpy throwing rocks*
*Lumpy gets shot*
Lumpy – AROIROOROO *death noise*
*Malla goes sicko mode, breaks through droid lines and starts dueling TPO*
Itchy – aroroo *watching VR completely clueless*
TPO – YESSS FINALLY A WORTHY OPPONENT. I’VE BEEN TRAINING MY ENTIRE LIFE FOR THIS. THIS IS MY PURPOSEEE
*fighting*
*lego yoda death sounds intensifies*
Yoda – jajajajaja
*strikes TPO with the force lightning, but it only makes him stronger*
TPO – YOU FOOLLL, YOU’VE ONLY MADE ME STRONGER
*shifts gravity of planet and drops them*
*everyone dies except the droids*
*L3-37 flies in on Millenium Falcon, crashing into TPO’s flying chair*
*L3-37 kisses TPO*
L3 – this is how we win. Not by saving what we love but by fighting what we hate
finn