In my last post, I talked about how I found my love for reading again during quarantine, but after that, I had to return back to school. If I am being honest I was so scared to return as I did not know how I was going to be able to readjust after not being in school for so long. However, seeing my friends and teachers again was nice as I had been separated from them for months. The return took place my junior year of high school. Everyone had put a huge emphasis on what was expected as a junior in high school and it was safe to say I was very overwhelmed.

In my junior year, I fell into a deep depression. It felt like I had the whole world on my shoulders and the pressure was really getting to me. People always said I seemed so happy that no one would have known how messed up my head was. I was very good at hiding how I felt and no one could have picked up on the differences. However, one thing made me feel like I could breathe. These were my books. At this point, in time I was reading for at least three hours every day. Some people called me crazy, but I felt like this was the only thing keeping me sane. I could lock myself in my room and read. During this time period, I was reading so many different books I could not even keep up with myself. Instead, I would read and then move right into the next book.

It was during this time that I found Colleen Hoover. She is an author that went extremely viral on TikTok for her books. I had never heard of her but I was happy to find her. One book in particular that I found the best was “It Ends With Us”. This book follows the main character Lily who struggles with an abusive husband and how she is able to escape and hopefully find happiness. While reading this book I was able to understand how easy it was to get trapped. She was in a relationship and I was in my own head. While they seem very different to me I made the connection.

One quote that always stuck out to from It Ends With Us was, “Sometimes we have to share it with the people who love us so we don’t come crashing down from the weight of it all. But I can’t help you unless I know you need it. Ask me for help. We’ll get through this, I know we can.” This made me realize that I can not keep fighting this battle by myself, instead, I needed to find a support system to help me.

This book made me realize you can not fight every battle alone. Instead, sometimes you need to find people to help you. After reading this book, I finally told my parents and my best friend about my struggles and was able to get the help I needed. I learned it was okay to feel, but sometimes it is hard to feel alone.