“Brother, I Hunt for My Angel” is not only the longest poem I have ever recorded, but also the most involved on the production side. The poem was recorded in segments. Each verse and chorus was its own unique recording that then had to be spliced together. This process led to some interesting changes made throughout. The first major difference was the ability to edit the actual content of the poem post recording. I ended up scrapping one instrumental segment for this initial version of the poem. Speaking of instrumental sections, that was the reason I recorded the poem in segments. I was concerned how the instrumental would sound after recording and I did not want to risk losing the whole poem to it. This was my first time experimenting with instruments in my poetry, so I kept things relatively safe and only included my mandolin, which I recorded in the same process as my normal poetry. I think the extra effort was worth it, although I would have liked to kept working on the sound quality of the instrumental segments so the mandolin rang a little cleaner.

The technical act of writing the poem was very similar to previous poems despite the added challenge of deciding how to incorporate the mandolin. I utilized a lot of repeating phrases and structures. This is particularly evident in the word “brother” and in all the music segments. I wanted to create an almost echoing correspondence within the lyrics of the poem. I did break the structure in a few places where I thought the main character would break (We’ll get into how I knew where he would break). Overall, the technical writing in this poem was secondary to the message.

This blog and my poetry is my outlet. I tend to hold things in until I burst, but this past Sunday was the single worst day of my life. Just under the past two years I have been in a relationship that I can only describe as life saving. My girlfriend was my best friend and we had our whole future planned out. I was never one to believe in love at first sight, but the work we both put in, the understanding we had, I thought our love was unbreakable. And it was, but not irreplaceable. Sunday night, I got on a Skype call with my girlfriend, and with tears in her eyes, she said we should break up. I was shocked. I loved her. I still do. And she loved me. She even said so as we talked. But that’s where it gets complicated. It was because she loved me that she wanted to end things now before she hurt herself and me more than we already were. She had found another person. Her “prince” in the poem. I couldn’t blame her. He was at the same college, I am three hours away. He is another artist. I am a scientist. How could I compete. I couldn’t just let her go though. I had to make sure she was in good hands. So I talked to him. I made him promise me that he would take care of her. She was after all my angel. I still hurt, but I trust her to have made the right decision. And I trust she knows that she still has a part of me with her. I will stay. I am the brother on the road. She is my angel. He is the prince. And I will never forget her. I will never stop loving who she is and what she has done for me. But you’ll hear more about that in another poem.