What will you do when you got sick? See the doctor? Go to CVS to buy some medicine? Or just let your body heal by itself? The first thing I notice when I first come to Penn State is that when people here get sick, they just go to the CVS and buy some medicine then that’s all. It is kind of a culture shock for me because in Taiwan if we got sick we will go to see the doctor, no matter what time is it or how serious it is. We tend to go to see the doctor and let the professional see what is happening to us. After I understand why people here most likely go to CVS instead of the doctor it kind of makes me sad. That is the cost of seeing a doctor is extremely high and not that efficient compared to other countries. Plus the health care in the U.S is provided by businesses/companies instead of the government. So without the insurance, we might spend like hundred or thousand dollars for a cold. What is even worse is that if you have a fever in the middle of the night you most likely do not go to the doctor to seek help because visiting the emergency room for a hospital going to cost you an average of $2200. This make the insurance become really important. So let’s say you do have insurance. You still need to “scheduled” for your illness. This only make sense for me if you have some disease that is not acute. For example, a routine inspection. This makes me feel unbelievable. How do I know when I will get sick. If I get sick on Monday and want to go to UHS I can’t because I need to schedule ahead. If I really need it I must call them and ask them if there’s a spot to fit in face their bad attitude. I have to say it is really unreasonable.
I want to use two personal example from using the UHS. First time is when I sprain my ankle really badly, I can’t walk or stand at the time and I try to go UHS for medical support such as X-Ray to see what happen. The crazy thing is I can’t I will have to “schedule” a appointment like 2-3 days ahead in order to see the sprain my ankle three days ago? So I have to call them to ask for a spot and the person who pick up the phone at first REFUSE to put me into anyspot because I didn’ schedule ahead, after 5 minutes of explaining, she finally unwillingly put me in the list. The second one is last time when I feel like I might have mid ear infection but not sure, so I want to schedule an appointment for future in case it getting worse. That was a Friday, I look at the Monday spot and there are still available from 8am to like 5pm. So I think “okay, I will see how I feel and make an appointment tomorrow if it still hurt.” Guess what? The next morning (Saturday) when I try to make an appointment, all the Monday appointment was gone. How is that even possible? We are saying after 12 hours people suddenly all need to check their ear?
This make me find out the big issue of the University Health Service, and the solution of this will not be trhaty hard. Having an actual option of “Same Day Appointment” (they do right now but it never actually let you have it at the same day). And a better service of the operator that really willing to help and willing to provide the help.
https://www.healthsystemtracker.org/chart-collection/health-spending-u-s-compare-countries-2/
https://www.talktomira.com/post/how-much-does-an-er-visit-cost
2). Does this piece’s title and introduction respond to an exigence?-Does it make the issue pressing or connect to other pressing needs and issues? Make suggestions.
This definitely relates to the issues within America’s medical practices (especially the cost of seeing a doctor/going to the hospital). I also think it touches on how slow appointments can be, and there aren’t as many options for people who need same day treatment. I also think this makes it pressing by showing the issue within the context of a university.
3). Comment on the thesis. Does it set up a clear argumentative claim? Is it advancing a specific policy or practice? Can you imagine how the rest of the argument will unfold?
I think that it’s advancing the policy of implementing a same day appointment system with better trained operators who are more friendly towards patients. I think that the thesis could be slightly clearer, but overall, your policy/practice definitely comes through.
1). Comment on the title. How does it offer a way forward on the issue? Does it hint at or echo the paper’s thesis? Make suggestions.
No title but I think if you said something about Free Healthcare or Healthcare access for all that would be a good title to encompass everything that your introduction is showing.
2). Does this piece’s title and introduction respond to an exigence?-Does it make the issue pressing or connect to other pressing needs and issues? Make suggestions.
I really liked the personal stance that you have with this issue and I completely agree it’s a huge issue, especially at college. I think that your personal connection really resonates with a lot of students and makes it something that we can all relate to. It would help if you provided us with a few facts about healthcare here, I liked that you had the graph but a little bit of explanation would be really great as well.
3). Comment on the thesis. Does it set up a clear argumentative claim? Is it advancing a specific policy or practice? Can you imagine how the rest of the argument will unfold?
I was a little confused as to what your specific thesis was, as I understand that the issue is with healthcare accessibility and cost at University Health Services, but it would help to see a specific thesis unfold. This could be what specific thing you want UHS to do, like “make same day appointments available” or “make university health services free for students”. I think that would really help strengthen your argument for the rest of your paper.