I don’t think I would know how to function if my life were completely stress-free.
These days, stressed seems to be my default setting. Between work, school, family obligations, and trying to eke out a few minutes for sleep every night, I find myself being pulled in what feels like no less than 25 different directions at once. But somehow, I manage to keep all the balls in the air and not drop any (for the most part). I know I need to get the amount of stress in my life under control; the most important tasks always seem to be the hardest to accomplish. It seems like there’s just not enough hours in the day to get everything that I need to do, done.
For someone like me, that’s really not good. Even worse, there’s evidence to prove it that extends well beyond the plethora of grey hairs I’ve accumulated.
A study by Barnes et.al (1997) shows that there is a link between stress and hypertension, especially among African-Americans. The researchers suggest that that Westernized and urbanized cultures expose African Americans to environmental and psychosocial stress factors that may not impact people of other cultures as readily, and cite social disorganization, lack of resources and social support, rural/urban migration, socioeconomic status, exposure to racism, and crowded and substandard living environments as being risk factors for self-defeating behaviors and ill health (Barnes et.al, 1997).
They go on to discuss the specific psychological and behavioral factors in African Americans that may also contribute to elevated stress levels and blood pressure. They cite the phenomenon known as “John Henryism”, defined as “an active coping style of hard work and determination to succeed against all odds” (Barnes et.al, 1997) as being a psychosocial factor correlated with hypertension in African Americans, and further suggest that a positive relationship between suppressed hostility and blood pressure for African-American males up to age 60 (Barnes et.al, 1997).
Good grief! Just when I think all my hard work is paying off, I find out that it’s literally killing me!
So, what do I do?
I can’t add more hours to my day, I can’t blow off work or school or my family, and I’ve got to sleep some time. I suppose the only thing I can do is what I’ve been doing: I meditate and pray every morning and night, I’ve learned the power of saying “no” when someone asks me to do something or be somewhere and I just don’t have the time, and most importantly, I’ve learned that I don’t always have to break my metaphorical neck to be the best at everything. By no means am I accepting failure, but do I really have to get an A on every test and paper? No. The world will not end if I don’t earn a perfect score, and drive myself mad trying to earn one.
There’s good stress and there’s bad stress; without any sort of stress, there would be no motivation to get things done. The smart person learns how to respond to the good and manage the bad in order to create some semblance of a harmonious life. If you don’t, you’ll end up so flustered and overextended that nothing gets accomplished and all those precariously juggled balls will come crashing to the ground. It’s OK to take a break sometimes. It’s OK to walk away from a project and pick it up later. Take time for YOU every once in a while; the world and its expectations will still be there when you come back, and you’ll (hopefully!) be refreshed and recharged enough to handle them once you do.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to take a nap.
Reference:
Barnes, V., Schneider, R., Alexander, C., & Staggers, F. (1997, July). Stress, stress reduction, and hypertension in African Americans: An updated review. Journal of the National Medical Association. Retrieved from https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2568086/