Have you ever questioned why some individuals seem naturally comfortable and secure in their relationships, and why others struggle with trust and intimacy? After taking many psychology classes during my undergraduate career, I have learned about different attachment styles and how they affect our interpersonal relationships with others. While reading the textbook, the author talked about how individuals develop attachment patterns early in life that can influence their interactions and relationships with others as adults (Gruman et al., 2017). The author also mentioned about the different attachment styles such as secure, preoccupied, fearful, and dismissing, which influence how individuals perceive themselves and their relationships.
When looking at the different attachment styles, we notice a difference in them that influences our interactions and closeness with others. Individuals with a secure attachment style are trusting, comfortable with closeness and interdependence. Individuals with preoccupied attachment style are needful of closeness and worried about abandonment. Individuals with fearful attachment styles are afraid of rejection, are mistrustful, and shy. Lastly, individuals with dismissing attachment style are self-reliant, independent, and uninterested in intimacy Miller & Perlman, 2009).
As I mentioned before, as someone who has taken several psychology courses, I have had to identify my own attachment style which helped me improve my relationships with others. Last semester, I took an interpersonal relationship where we had to fill out different questionnaires and I found that I have secure attachment style where I tend to be very trusting and comfortable with intimacy. However, my secure attachment style was not compatible with someone who has dismissing attachment style where they are not as codependent on the relationship. This can cause conflicts which can result in broken relationships because individuals are not aware of their attachment style and are not able to work through their issues with themselves and others. Understanding the differences in attachment styles between two individuals can help bridge the gap and promote mutual understanding and respect.
In conclusion, by focusing on adult attachment styles and understanding how they impact our relationships with others, we can work on ourselves which will positively impact our interaction with others. Having an open mind to the differences we might have with others and allowing open communication with others, we can be more understanding of different attachment styles which can improve our interactions and closeness with others
Source: Gruman, J. A., Schneider, F. W., & Coutts, L. M. (Eds.). (2016). Applied social psychology : Understanding and addressing social and practical problems. SAGE Publications, Incorporated.