In high school, I had a very tight-knit group of friends that were all deeply involved in choir. We most definitely furthered every stereotype abounded to theatrical, obnoxious singers who compulsively use jazz hands. Our love for music and the vulnerability needed to create a cohesive, unified voice bonded us in ways that no other activity can. Though we were an eccentric group of dispositions, we also were involved in similar activities outside of choir; most of my friends were high-achieving students taking the same AP classes and doing similar volunteer projects and all playing a sport or some sort of other activity that solidified us as “well-rounded students”. And while this was very beneficial in high school, and I gained an appreciation for many different fields of study, college operates very differently.
High school is essentially an extended general education forum; you delve into all areas of course study and gain at least a basic comprehension of the cannons of academia. Also, the opportunities to get involved in things are not nearly as wide as they are in college, especially at a school the size of Penn State. Anyway, my friends cultivated our friendships by becoming involved in similar activities, and resultantly becoming very similar on paper. While this worked in high school, college is very different in that it is a forum to pursue individual interests, wide though they may be. My friends and I initially made the mistake of attempting to attend every club orientation that any of us were interested in together; even if the biomedical engineering major of the group had absolutely no interest in Kalliope, Penn State’s Literary Arts Magazine (not to stereotype engineers in any way). I’m not sure what we were thinking would result from this; I guess we may have gained appreciations for things that we had no consciousness of before entering college.
Though in reality, we were really just wasting time and missing opportunities to get involved in activities we were legitimately interested in. We were also missing out on time that we could have spent getting to know other people, instead choosing to huddle in a comfortable circle of people that we had already gotten to know sufficiently well. Eventually, we started to go our separate ways extracurricularly; two of my closest friends joined sororities, three others joined THON Special Interest Organizations, another became involved in the Student Programming Association and several of us joined different THON committees.
And while I was apprehensive that the sheer time-consumption of different activities would slowly tear us apart, the different activities and interests that they fostered actually strengthened the dynamics of our friendships; I have learned so much about many different Penn State cultures; I can now recite the Greek alphabet without hesitation, and have gleaned many other pieces of quirky knowledge from my friend’s involvements. But it goes beyond my beginning to understand the seemingly endless activities and cultures that comprise Penn State; I appreciate our differences in interests because they truly make me a more well-rounded person. I have learned now that a piece of paper cannot confirm how well-rounded a student is; rather the experiences that he or she has and has embraced. It is great to make friends that are involved in the same activities as you are; but college provides the forum for you to create lasting friendships with those that are polar opposite to you as well. And that is invaluable.
I had a similar experience in high school, my friends and I were in many of the same clubs and many of the same AP classes. As a matter of fact, my best friend and I were in all of the same clubs together and were on the executive board together. In my high school, you just were not really friends with people who you were not in the same clubs with. But here, I like that not all of my friends are in the same clubs as me. I get to explore my own interests and through my friends I can also learn about the worlds of other clubs. I also think it’s kind of nice that you get a break from seeing all the same people all of the time, otherwise college would just be the same as high school.
Hanging out with people nothing like you in college is definitely a sometimes awkward sometimes frustrating experience. In high school, we were all pretty much with each other all day, which meant we began being characterized by the things we did. The great thing about college is you can choose to be around people when you want and you can be who you want without people having previous assumptions about you.
I think that in high school another big reason we ended up in the same activities as our friends was how convenient it was. I know more than once I said “Oh you want a ride home? Then come to Young Democrats and I’ll drive you after.” My entire AP Chem class joined in some way or another the spring musical because of the homework circle that developed backstage. In college we don’t necessarily need that.
I see what you’re saying, I feel like in high school you made your friends based off of your similar interests and therefore those people had the most in common with you. Also high school was much more divided into different categories whereas at such a large university the interests you pursue only define you not who you associate with.
There definitely a lot of truth to what you are saying here. In college, people are definitely more into pursuing their own interests regardless of what their close friends do. Sometimes friends’ values coincide with yours, but its not as big of a deal as it used to be in high school. In high school, you were cool if you liked what everyone else likes, but it seems like people are way cooler in college if they pursue their own passions and skills.