What do you say to someone when they talk badly about your best friend? What if that person is your boyfriend? Those of you that requested an update about Matt and Sam… here it is.

As a recap, two of my friends, Matt and Sam, met through me at the beginning of the semester. After Sam and her boyfriend broke up, the two began “talking,” however it was made clear that Sam did not want a relationship. Flash forward a few weeks and the two were very content with their situation, and then got drunk together with some other friends. When Sam practically blacked out, she kissed someone else. After realizing what happened, she apologized repeatedly, Matt said everything was okay and that technically they were not dating so it wasn’t an issue… and then went back on that and chaos erupted.

In the past week, Matt has gone from accepting Sam’s apology to semi-ghosting her. Although I do not believe things will ever return to how they were before everything happened, I do wish for them to be able to settle things and stay friendly. So, being the helpful mutual friend, I have been intervening.

In my attempt to stay friends with both of them, I have been trying, and failing, to stay neutral on the subject. This is often a good tactic in situations like these so that you can help both sides see things at face value and possibly clear up their own views. However, I do side slightly with Sam on the current situation. I am not saying that what happened is not her fault or blaming Matt for all of this, but I do believe the way Matt has been punishing Sam for the whole thing is unfair.

Matt is hurting, and in his pain is hurting Sam. This really strains me because it is very difficult to help both of them when my scale on the matter has been tipped. In exchange, Matt has talked more about his personal feelings and issues with his friends (within which my boyfriend, Spencer, is included), which has been helping him a bit. So, in situations where you cannot help all sides alone, seeking help to help others is really useful. The number one rule in helping others is also to help yourself; if you cannot get something positive from the experience then you may feel it a waste of your time, and that is not the goal.

However, with Spencer helping Matt instead, Spencer and I have done some talking. Today he told me that he has never been fond of Sam and thinks it would be best if she stayed away from Matt entirely, for Matt’s sake. Sam is my best friend, and I therefore, like many other friends would, feel entitled to stand up for her when something is not right. In any situation, standing against injustice is the right thing to do, whether it is easy or not, and normally my advice would be to do this.

But what will taking a stand do for my relationship with Spencer? Stay tuned next week and we will see if there are any updates to be made, but unfortunately I do not believe there will be must else relevant to my blog that I can discuss for you all to take from this matter.

Lesson: if you can avoid having two of your friends date or talk, do it; it only causes tensions and headaches among all with friendly ties.

Philanthropy is defined as an act done for humanitarian purposes (“Philanthropy”). At Penn State University, the mention of this word almost always incites the thought of “THON.” For me, however, this word just describes my day-to-day life.

In high school, I was a part of many community service organizations from Key Club to Relay For Life. The experiences I had within these groups changed who I am as a person and helped me discover my passion of service in high school.

When I came to college, this passion followed me, but the means in which I was able to express my drive completely changed. At Penn State, there are many philanthropy clubs available to join, but it is discouraged for new students to join more than two clubs within a semester, at least until they adjust to the workload and relaxed lifestyle. After joining two other clubs of interest to me, I was left with no way of fulfilling this everlasting passion of mine.

So, I had to find another way.

This blog will be about my weekly journey with doing what I can for others and my advice in doing good in your community. Also, since in just about every other social setting drama does occur, I will also include the drama that comes with my philanthropic actions

In early October, I applied to be on a THON committee and had an interview to be on either the Entertainment or OPPerations committees. This past week, the meetings began and I am proud to say I made OPPerations! Our responsibilities within this committee are to help keep THON a happy and healthy place for all of the sick and healing children that will attend the event. Up until THON, we just have meetings and become a family (at least that’s what I got from the first meeting). I am very excited to see where this organization will take me and I cannot wait to share it online in my blog as well!

Finally, my friends Sam and Matt have a very complex situation. The two of them met through me as a mutual friend at the beginning of the semester. Sam has since broken up with her boyfriend from home and she and Matt have become very flirty. They have agreed not to date yet because of the delicate situation with Sam’s ex, but they are definitely extremely flirty and it is rumored that Matt desires a closer connection with Sam. This past week, Sam was very drunk and made a big mistake without knowing it. Being the good friend to both of them as I am, both Sam and Matt came to me to have their problems sorted out. I spent hours talking to them both and helping them make sense of the situation as a whole, rather than just from their points of view. As of right now, they seem to be almost back to the friendship they had before the explosion of drama, but I think Matt is realizing that Sam will probably not settle down with him anytime soon. My advice for this kind of situation is to help both sides see everything clear enough to make a decision on their own, but make sure that you yourself are not overwhelmed by having to deal with both sides of the issue.

“Philanthropy.” Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/philanthropy.