Every day I am at Penn State I feel like I meet someone who is in a long-distance relationship. Well good news for myself and everyone else I meet is a study published in the Journal of Communication said yes, absence does in fact make the heart grow stronger. 
The study found that men and women in long distance relationships are more likely to share thoughts and feelings that held more meaning. The study also showed that couples tend to idealize their partners’ behavior, which increases intimacy. Researchers at Cornell University asked 63 heterosexual couple, half who were in long distance relationships, about their communication. The participants’ averages were just under the age of 21, had been in a relationship for almost two years and had been apart for 17 months. Researchers asked the couples to track their interactions with their partners: how often they communicated, how long, and what they used to do it. The study found that the couples who lived apart tended to have less daily interaction, but the interaction they did have was longer and more meaningful. The couples that were apart inevitable ended up revealing more about themselves compared to couples that were not apart.
A licensed psychotherapist, Rachel Sussman, said long distance relationships are becoming easier and the nature is changing because of technology and the access to video chat. Researchers from Cornell also found that almost three million Americans now live apart from their spouses for reasons other than divorce and that between a quarter and one-half of college students are currently in long distance relationships. The study proved to be pretty positive that long distance does make the heart grow fonder.
There are some problems with the design. It was only a study so it cannot be conclusive. The sample size of the study was also very small, if the study would be repeated with a larger sample, it could be more conclusive. In addition, information could easily have been left out such as the loneliness and stresses that come from living apart. Many couples in long distance tend to second guess the relationship and tend to feel extremely lonely at times. Before the study posted in the Journal of Communication, all the research showed the negatives of long distance and why they would not work. However, the new study done by Cornell gives people in long distance relationships some optimism for the future of their relationship.
The bottom line is, yes long distance relationships are hard and can be potentially stressful, but with trust and dedication they can prove to be even healthier than couples who are located in the same geographic region.
Sources:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/18/long-distance-relationship-benefits_n_3616839.html
http://www.today.com/health/long-distance-love-may-be-stronger-you-think-new-study-6C10660702
I think there certainly are examples of long distance relationships working out, but I don’t think that “absence makes the heart grow fonder”. Proximity is said to have the greatest influence on determining relationships both romantic and friendly. If the study says that people in long distance relationships idealize their partner’s actions, I don’t think this would necessarily lead to greater intimacy–it leads to a better theoretical view of the person and their actions because you aren’t there actually experiencing them first hand. I think it would be interesting to conduct a more long term study, examining long distance couples after they “reunite”, and see how successful the relationships are in the long term; though, there would be so many confounding variables it would be difficult to get a really conclusive answer.
I think that long distance relationships are very hard to maintain. Despite the fact that I do agree with you and I think it is possible for a long distance relationship to work, it takes far more work then those that are not long distance. When apart from ones partner people must strategically organize given times of the day that will be dedicated to communicating with their significant other. Modern technology has definitely effect couples ability to “make it work”. People nowadays have the ability to not only call each other but they are also able to video chat. According to Ben Michaelis, Ph.D, from the Huffington Post, “successful long-distance relationships appear to have four factors in common: prioritization, commitment, sharing and planning”. If you are interested to learn about the reasoning behind why Michaelis believes that long distance relationships can work check out this link: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ben-michaelis-phd/love-and-relationships_b_4731003.html
Me and my girlfriend have been going out for almost a year and a half and we both go here. She even lives in the same building, and is only a floor above. This happened by complete chance. Needless to say since we’ve started school our relationship hasn’t been the same. We simply see too much of each other. At times I think of what it would be like if we went to different schools and how happy we’d be when we did see each other after long periods of time. I definitely agree with your blog.
I think it is pretty much up to the couple, because every couple works out differently. Some peoples personalities make it harder for a long distance relationship to work out. I do believe it is true that “distance makes the heart grow fonder” though. This doesn’t only have to be the case with relationships. Since this semester of college is really the first time in my entire life that I am away from some of my best friends, I miss them more and more every day. My one friend and her boyfriend both went away to college this fall, and their relationship already didn’t work out. They wound up breaking up a few weeks into the semester, which I think may be because of the personality types of each of them.
I also agree the “distance makes the heart grow fonder.” I have been in a relationship now for 3 years, going on four. He is two years older then me so our long distance relationship has been going on for over a year now. (he stayed home his first year of college) and now we are both away. I was really interested in your blog post when I saw the title because I am able to relate to it so much. After reading it, I feel like it is a really hard thing to study. You mention that, ” information could easily have been left out such as the loneliness and stresses that come from living apart.” I also think things that effect long distance relationships is what you are distracted by when you aren’t with your significant other. For example, various school clubs, school work, night life (in a students case) can be very distracting and make it hard for things to last when you are on such opposite pages. You also mention, “long distance relationships are becoming easier and the nature is changing because of technology and the access to video chat.” I found this interesting article that states a lot of what you already mentioned, but instead refutes the technology claim. It states, “technology can make it easy to present your partner with only a surface façade and mask your true feelings.” I strongly recommend you check it out and see what else you can find on the topic that you hadn’t already found!
Alex,
I do agree with you that it can be very difficult to maintain a long distance relationship and I also agree it is something that is very hard to study. I was interested to see what science’s perspective of it was in this situation. However, like you I feel it is specific for each relationship. Sometimes being loyal isn’t enough and the distance alone can cause things to end. However, I’m very intrigued by the topic overall and I really liked your perspective on the situation!
My best friend was in a long distance relationship and it did not work even though they were both loyal to one another. I feel that even though some studies may say otherwise, this is not something you can study, it is something that either comes naturally to a relationship or it doesn’t. Both sides of the argument have traction, on the one hand great long distance relationships have the happiness of coming together after being away for so long, it is such a burst of happiness that people cannot control but for all the feelings to rush back into your head. However, there are also many arguments against them especially college ones due to the fact everyone who has a social life is going out and seeing attractive people of the opposite sex, and even if nothing is going on on either end jealousy could play a deadly role in the relationship. http://health.howstuffworks.com/relationships/advice/10-reasons-long-distance-relationships-dont-work.htm
http://oregonstate.edu/counsel/do039s-and-don039ts-success-long-distance-relationship
I actually agree with the idea that long distance relationship makes the heart grow fonder, because two my best friends are having long distance relationship and it seems like it works really well. I remember my friend told me that, long distance relationship is actually better than always staying and spending time together, because, distance makes the love and affection stronger and it provides natural sense of distance that the couples have more freedom to their own works. I found this web page that lists 19 benefits of long distance relationship. http://www.buzzfeed.com/jeremybender/reasons-why-long-distance-relationships-are-better-than-y#ujjlh0