Psychoanalysis is a theory developed by known psychologist Sigmund Freud.  This theory emphasizes how our unconscious actions or thoughts influence our conscious mind.  Freud believed that our past childhood experiences, such as traumatic childhood memories, impact “the development of later personality traits and psychological problems” (Wede Psych 100 Lecture 2).  The past is the root for current problems.

            Psychoanalysis comes into the picture whenever I play soccer.  Soccer has been my life since I was five years old.  While playing in a game for my home club team the summer right before my junior year of high school, I got into a bad soccer incident on the field.  I was going towards the net with the ball, and I became trapped between a defender and the goalie.  I ended up colliding with the goalie and breaking both my tibia and fibula in my right leg.  Obviously it was the most painful thing I have ever felt, and I was immediately taken to the hospital to get casted.  After a year of going from one different sized cast to the next and using crutches or a wheelchair to get around, I found out that I needed surgery on my leg.  Getting surgery meant another full year of a cast and crutches.  So the whole process to get me fixed and healed took around two years.  This experience was the most painful, emotional, disheartening, and tough experience in my life.  However, I finally conquered it and eventually got back to playing as much as my leg could handle.

            Now, I play for Penn State’s Women’s Club Soccer team.  I play forward on the team, which is the same position I played when I broke my leg.  Since I went through such a traumatic experience after colliding with the goalie, I now subconsciously always avoid any tough confrontation with a goalie during a game.  Whenever there is a 50/50 chance for me or the goalie to have the ball in a game, I always back away from the challenge and let her have the ball.  I think I do this because breaking my leg affected my thought processes so heavily that I would rather lose the ball than take a chance at re-breaking my leg.  I am still so terrified of the possibility of going through all of that again, which is why my legs just automatically stop whenever I am running towards a competition with a goalie.  That past childhood traumatic experience has affected the way I act today.