As a fan of the Notebook, Dear John, and just about every other romantic movie there is, growing up I had high expectations for the male generation to be like Noah Calhoun from the Notebook, Romeo from Romeo and Juliet and my ultimate favorite Jack Dawson from the Titanic. Unfortunately in State College I haven’t found that guys are interested in the commitment, and I also haven’t found that some girls are either. Which leads me to the question of is it true? Does anyone want the commitment? Is love dead?
There was a study done by Oxford University that 341 people participated in that involved taking an online psychological research survey in which they were asked about their role to their best friend and role to their romantic partner, to see if it was equal. It was proven that women generally treat their friends with cooperation instead of competition; women also placed their significant other higher than themselves on a scale of importance. As being a young adolescent I have observed lots of relationships and always find it rare when the guy is interested more than the woman because I think women care more about their relationship than anything else more than themselves because they like the attention, dependence and loyalty they receive. The study came to a significant point in the conclusion that women’s overall happiness depends more on their happiness in their intimate relationship. This doesn’t shock me because of how much women overthink things and are constantly looking for a new relationship to feel happy again. According to the Oxford University and a different study women are functioned as nurturers, they have the need to take care of people. Both women and men are interested in intimacy in the relationship, but have different benefits that go along with that. Women tend to want to sharpen their connection on an emotional and long lasting level. Men are not interested in creating a home together and being in a relationship for years to come, they are more focused on their work and making an impact in the each relationship than one for a longer time. I think this is very accurate information but is not a true statistical study. The information provided would have been more clearly with valid participants and research method such as a survey explaining which role one plays in the relationship.
There is an article done by her campus, which is a college based BuzzFeed or odyssey that I am a writer for and there was an article about the other perspective. This blog talks about why guys want a relationship rather than why they don’t. One of my favorite quotes from the blog is by a graduate of Vanderbilt University named Timmy. He says, “Being a gentleman means respecting women and knowing that they’re your equal. When I see women, I’m interested [in them] as my equals; I want to be their partner and their boyfriend.” I think there will always be the distinction, especially in college whether or not this guy wants the commitment or not even maybe the girl. There is no set answer on this hypothesis, excuse the cliché but, when it’s meant to be, it will last.
Really cool and interesting topic!! I loved how you related it to the Notebook and other movies like that, it really draws people in. Even though the correlational studies explained things, I wish there was more experiment based evidence to prove the theory. But, like the commenter before me said, that is kind of impossible because if it were to be real then you would need the two people to have feelings for one another. This does not just happen on command from two people. I agree though that even though both guy and girl can be committed, it may be for different reasons. Good post!
I think you would find it very interesting to check out my blog on sex drive. It relates to this blog in my opinion because I learned while writing it that it is in the biological make up of men to want to impregnate as many women as possible. That to me contributes to why men are less likely to want to settle down in one relationship, or why they typically are the ones that cheat. Yet, this topic is a hard one to study because faith gets into it. I am a firm believer that when “its meant to be it will last”. I believe faith and/or god will make it happen so for those who think like me the study is tricky and we tend to immunise the hypothesis.